Sarah is this freaky chick at work, she is pretty cool. She is a lightweight. She had her stomach pumped once.

She likes to think she is not a lightweight, but she is.

She makes me laugh really hard sometimes.

Especially when she says "I'll be your bitch"

She only said it like once, but it was funny shit when I heard it.

It's also really funny when she says "You don't love me, you just love my doggystyle" she said "doggystyle" a lot.

She is the one who makes fun of me all day, and I try to talk her into riding in some big mail cart.

Whistling the Indiana Jones theme song all along the way.

We came up with a plan to dig up old caskets from grave yards, then open our own funeral parlor, and sell used caskets for half price. We could make a killing... that was bad.

She's easy to piss off, that makes it fun for me.

The Mighty Butt and Upchuck hook-up? I think it was bound to happen at some time, and get this kids, it has! We have known each other for about a year and a little while ago, the inevitable happened and we started seeing each other. We kick ass.

I forgot about a funny story I could tell about Sarah. You see, a bunch of punks from work went out to my friends, uncles farm and camped out there. Well there was a little pond in the back of the property so we decided to camp around that. This was a dainty little pond complete with lily pads and all the works, and Sarah went out in the dark to find it. She started to walk down a little hill towards the lake and just as her foot raised up to take her last step I said "Sarah, I think the lake is right ther..." splash. Then all I heard was "AHHH! Help me out of this lake!" We laughed for the next 9 or 10 hours.

She wanted me to add some stories to the page, but I'm a bitch and I don't want to put them on the mothership page so I will put them here on her page email her to tell her whether or not they should be here or not.

The first one is at work and for our April fools day joke, sarah came up with the idea that we (everyone on our shift) should call up our boss's phone mail and call in for the next day (being April 1). We all made up goofy stories for our excuses to call in sick or whatever. Sarah called and said that one of the big machine things at work fell on top of her, the boss freaked out didn't listen to any of the other phonemails to realize it's a joke, and ran back to that area to see if anything was messed up. My excuse was I was in the hospital with a bad case of gonnorhia (or some disease that's spelled kinda like that). One of our supervisor ladies called at the end and said that she got a job at the local strip club and the tips were to good to pass up so she wouldn't be in the next day. Then she said April fools and the boss realized it was all in good fun. It was pretty funny.

The second story comes from when we went to this little redneck bar called hanks to throw darts and drink (the latter I could not participate in, due to my youngliness). We were playing darts and these "dart sharks" came over to hang out like they always do when we go up there. Anyway, they ask us to play against them and we didn't want to cause they'd kick our ass. They finally bother us enough for us to let them play and of course we get our asses kicked. Did I mention that one dude comes over and is just a major freak and he does this thing that I and everyone else in the world has heard or seen about for the past thousand years now, this thing is I think called "hitting the rock" ya know like the thing that guys do instead of giving fives or shaking hands or whatever, they "hit the rock" ya know, hit the rock homie. Well, this dude comes up and says "this is a Hanks thing, we tap knuckles like this," then he proceeded to "hit the rock." Only this wasn't your average "hit the rock," it was a flaming ass gay, pantywaste of a "hit the rock." Now, any of my readers (I have readers?) should know that I have no problem with gay people, but flaming ass gay shit really pisses me off. I get annoyed with these feminine little guys, the problem being feminine chicks aren't as feminine as these guys. For god's sakes man, be a little assertive about it. Pansy. Then this other dude comes in and gives high 5's by barely tapping hands with us (me and sarah played on opposite teams with these weirdos) I just wanted to shake him and scream DUDE! PUT SOME MUSCLE INTO IT, YOU 3 YEAR OLD LITTLE GIRL!!!! It gets on my nerves when people don't get a clue when we are being obvious about not wanting them around. Googely.

 

This page may be added to as events may occur.

 

 

I want mommy! 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Sarah's butt productions