"Kathryn, I don't think this is going to work."
Commander Chakotay crossed his arms against his chest and fixed his best friend with a deep, pleading gaze. Captain Kathryn Janeway gazed back, trying to stifle a grin. "Chakotay, this was your idea. Where were you planning to sleep, in my bathtub?"
His soulful brown eyes now glinted with undisguised humor and mischief. "Well, if you really want me to answer that..."
She rolled her eyes. "Men. You all have one-track minds. Chakotay, you're not sleeping in my bed. This was your idea. I agreed because we're friends, and because we've lived together before and know what to expect."
"We also had two beds then. There's only one here." He smiled then, his dimples winking beguiling. "You have the biggest bed on the ship, Kathryn. You'll never even know I'm there." His duffel bag dropped to the floor with a thud.
Her eyes went wide with surprise. Oh yes, I'll know you're there. That's what I'm worried about... Instead of voicing the thought, she simply shook her head. "No."
He sat down on the couch with a heavy, beleaguered sigh. "All right, Kathryn. Have it your way. But I'll probably fall off here a dozen times during the night. I'll be bruised and tired and cranky, and since it will be all your fault, naturally I'll have to hold a grudge and ignore you all day on the bridge, leaving you with only Tom Paris for entertainment."
She couldn't help it. A laugh escaped, and her entire body trembled with mirth. "That has to be the most convoluted piece of logic I've ever heard!"
He smiled fully again, and this time his eyes betrayed a hint of the cunning he had once used to survive in the Maquis. Kathryn had a sudden, sinking feeling she'd just unwittingly succumbed to an all-out, full-bore Maquis attack.
As it turned out, she was right.
"Chakotay, I don't think this is going to work."
Her heart plummeted into her stomach as his dark eyes fluttered open and gazed at her from the neighboring pillow, his mere presence beside her throwing her hormones into chaos. "Is there a problem, Kathryn?"
He seemed much too smug. Granted, he had every right to be, wheedling his way into her bed as he had, but still. "You're hogging the covers. And you're on my side."
The look on his face said he was merely humoring her. "I see. Well..." He pushed the covers down to his waist, propped himself up on an arm, and carefully studied the mattress. "You must have put the wrong sheets on, then. These seem to be the ones without the Demilitarized Zone down the middle. Since that's the case, I'm allowed to make forays into your territory whenever I see fit."
The Death Glare bored into him, but he didn't even flinch. Without so much as blinking, he slid a hand over and poked a solitary finger into the mattress on what was clearly her side. "Commander!" she snarled.
He smiled lazily. "Captain."
They stared at each other for a long moment. Finally, Kathryn stuck her tongue out at him, then rolled over, presenting Chakotay with her back. "Good night, Commander," she said pointedly.
She could feel him settling in beside her. After a few minutes, his voice came, dripping with amusement. "Don't I even get a story and a kiss goodnight?"
Her reply as to what he would get was short, rude, and to the point. He briefly wondered if such a thing was possible, if Tuvok would suspect something, and if anyone would ever find his body, then yawned and closed his eyes.
He could think of worse ways to go.
Chakotay awoke with the feeling that something was definitely out of place. After a moment, he realized that what was out of place was his captain. Specifically, she was now on his side of the bed. More specifically, she was on him.
With a muffled groan, he realized that his body had apparently been aware of the fact before his brain and had reacted accordingly. Not only was he painfully aroused, but his captain and best friend was sprawled atop him like it was an everyday occurrence, and he couldn't do a damned thing about it.
Her earlier plans for his untimely demise now seemed fairly appealing.
Either she had to move or he had to move, and soon. He offered up a quick prayer to whomever might be listening, then gently nudged his captain. "Kathryn."
He received a slight grunt for his efforts, but nothing else. He sighed. "Kathryn." He shook her shoulder more firmly. "Kathryn, wake up."
She stirred slightly. "Hmm... Chakotay..."
Oh, God, was that her hand sliding up his chest? Panic was beginning to set in. "Damn it, Kathryn, wake up and knock it off. You're killing me..."
Yes, that was definitely her hand sliding up his chest. Her other one was...
He stifled a groan. The hand on his chest now curled tightly into his t-shirt. The other one was under the covers, on his thigh, and moving north at a steady rate. "Kathryn..." The desperate entreaty came out as an anguished groan.
One eye blinked sleepily open. "What time is it?" she murmured, her lips vibrating mercilessly against his neck.
"Uh... 0300." His voice hadn't cracked like that since he was thirteen.
Her slow smile sent him into full Red Alert status. "Early," she said. "Good..."
Chakotay suddenly found his arms, and his mouth, full of warm, willing, and sexily rumpled woman. "Mmf... Kathryn..."
Smug, half-closed blue eyes met his wide, astonished brown ones. "Chakotay. Good morning." She glanced down at him. "Oh, I'm sorry. I'm on your side of the bed." She smiled sweetly. "Would you like me to move?"
He managed to shake his head. "I wouldn't advise it..."
She arched an eyebrow. "Oh? Why not?"
She shrieked in surprise as she suddenly found herself rolled beneath her best friend's hot, hard, and extremely aroused body. "Finder's keepers," he informed her, his voice rumbling low. "I found you in my territory, so now I get to keep you."
Her arms slid around him, her hands spreading on his broad, muscled back. "Somehow I don't think this is what Neelix had in mind when he suggested we double up."
His lips traced her jaw. "We're conserving resources..."
She reached up and grasped his face lightly. "I say we expend a few resources. Energy, for one thing..."
He smiled against her lips. "Aye, Captain... I'm ready and willing to serve..."
Her hands slipped beneath his t-shirt. "Time's a wasting, Commander..."
His response was wordless, but elegant and persuasive.
It was impossible to argue.
The captain and commander settled into their chairs on the bridge later that morning, business-like yet relaxed. "Good morning, Mr. Paris. Report."
Tom swiveled around in his chair at conn. "Morning, Captain, Commander. Everything's quiet so far. Our, ah, guests, seem to be behaving themselves. Last report from Security indicated no major incidents overnight."
Chakotay grinned. "Everything all right with our own resident Klingon?"
Tom smiled. "Yeah. She's getting pretty cranky, though. I promised her a trip to the movies tonight if she isn't too tired, so maybe she can relax a little." He eyed his commanding officers with a speculative look. "You look rested, Chakotay. I didn't know Starfleet couches had gotten any more comfortable."
Kathryn and Chakotay shared a quick glance. "What makes you think I slept on the couch?" Chakotay asked quietly. "Maybe the captain did. She certainly fits on them better than I do."
Tom studied them carefully. They were both relaxed and unruffled by the conversation. "Because you're too much of a gentleman to kick the captain out of her own bed. Besides, she'd kick your butt from here to Kronos if you tried."
Kathryn smiled. "Thank you, Tom."
At that moment, a jaw-cracking yawn overcame Chakotay. He smiled apologetically. "Actually, I did wake up a lot last night. I'm kind of sore, too."
When nether the captain nor commander so much as twitched, Tom shrugged and turned back to his controls, disappointed. "A hot water shower helps," he replied over his shoulder. "The captain's couch is probably just as bad as Harry's."
With his back to the command area, Tom didn't see the quick, smug grins exchanged by the CO's, but the hair on the back of his neck stood on end.
Yes, it was definitely going to be an interesting day.