She had forgotten about the letters.
They were still bundled together with the ribbon from her wedding
bouquet. Though yellowed and delicate, the neat, graceful handwriting that covered them
still stood out proudly, a testament to a time long ago, and a love that still burned
strong.
She had gone up into the attic to find an old doll cradle she had seen
up here once. Her grandchildren were outside in the yard below playing, and her
granddaughter had come to ask her if she had one.
As she'd pushed aside an old box, it had toppled over, its contents spilling out onto the dusty attic floor. Muttering a curse at her clumsiness, she stooped down to pick them up. That was when she found the letters.
She moved to the window and sat down beneath it, her
back propped up against the wall. She carefully untied the bundle and set it in her lap.
She picked up the top letter and held it in the streaky sunlight. She began to read.
"Beverly,
You own my heart. My soul is yours. From now 'till eternity, true to my
love for you I'll be.
Me"
Her mission in the attic was long forgotten. With those simple written
words, her mind was cast back in time. She could remember clearly the day she received
that first letter, and the chain of events that had led to it being sent.
*"Jean-Luc, what time do we dock at Starbase 19?"
Dr. Beverly Crusher arched a delicate eyebrow mischievously and smiled behind her cup of
coffee. Captain Jean-Luc Picard didn't miss the smile, or the trouble he sensed was
brewing behind that beautiful face.
"Around 1300 hours, I believe Will said. Why?" Better to extract the information from her now, rather than be surprised later.
"Well, there's this little cafe tucked away in a corner of the starbase. It's wonderful, Jean-Luc. The ambiance is simply..." Her voice trailed off fondly. "Well, would you like to come with me? For lunch?" Picard smelled a rat. A gorgeous, brilliant, redheaded rat. But a rat, nonetheless.
"This little *cafe*. It wouldn't happen to be called "Death's Door", would it?" he asked suspiciously.
Crusher squirmed slightly and picked at her croissant. Damn, the man was good. She had been betting that he wouldn't know about it. Well, there was still time to salvage the situation. "I can't recall the name of the place. I just know where it is, that's all." She hoped he'd buy it.
Picard shot her a withering stare from the opposite side of the table. "Level 13, Section 13, Area 1313?"
Beverly pretended to be thinking hard. The location was kind of hard to forget, after all. Unfortunately, Jean-Luc was not fooled. "Um, that *could* be it," she offered.
"Beverly, only station lowlifes and shady, underhanded *people* go there! If we were to be caught there..." He let the sentence trail off in what he hoped was a deterring tone. However, she smiled sweetly.
"And just how would you know about that, *Captain*?"
Got him. "I, well, that is... Well, how do *you* know about it?" Might as well turn the tables on her.
Ha. Fat chance. "Well, Jean-Luc, since you've *never* been there," she said with a grin, "maybe we should try it. I really doubt that we'd get caught. C'mon, Jean-Luc, be adventurous," she goaded.
He stood and cleared the table wordlessly. She kept a knowing smirk on her face as he meticulously cleaned every crumb from the table, pushed in his chair, and pulled hers out so she could get up. As they walked out of his quarters, he muttered, "If I get one of my ears nailed above the bar, you're really going to regret this."
Her squeal of delight echoed up and down the corridor, and she planted a quick, solid kiss on the lips of a very surprised starship captain. "Thank you, Jean-Luc! We'll have a great time!"
She happily disappeared down the corridor,
and he stood rooted to the spot where she had kissed him, a silly grin on his face. One
thing was certain. Lunch would be anything but dull.
"Here it is, Jean-Luc. Section 13. It should be just around the corner up there," Beverly whispered. She was dressed all in black, and her hair was flying free upon her shoulders. She looked more the part of the gorgeous villain than a sneaking Starfleet officer. Jean-Luc was enchanted, to say the least. It wasn't often that he was able to see this side of his best friend.
They entered the bar a moment later, and the patrons all went silent as they scoped out the intruders to their domain. Beverly, undeterred, flashed the bartender a brilliant smile and dragged her reluctant escort over to a far corner booth.
The bartender arrived a moment later, deposited two foaming drinks on their table with a grunt, and then walked back to the bar. Beverly grinned at the captain. "See? I told you this would be fun. Ambiance. I love it."
She failed to notice, however, the large brute heading their way. Picard did. "Beverly, I think there's a little bit *too* much ambiance. And it's on its way over here."
She looked up in time to see a very, very large humanoid stop at their table. He was approximately seven feet tall, and his grungy clothing barely covered all of his bulging muscles. He leered at her with undisguised lust. "Y'er the best lookin' thing to walk in this place inna long time. Wanna ditch the midget here'n join me'n my buddies?"
It wasn't much of a question, as he didn't leave her much choice. A large slab of beef, what could only be the guy's hand, reached down and yanked Beverly out of the booth, reminiscent of the early cavemen. Beverly shot a look at Jean-Luc that said 'Get me out of this *now*, or else your next physical will be *very* thorough' and tried, albeit ineffectually, to wrangle herself away from Gorilla Man.
Jean-Luc, still bristling from the midget remark, vaulted out of the booth and blocked Mr. Muscle's path. "Excuse me, but the lady is with me. Kindly take your hands off her, and go on about your business."
Brute Boy stared at Picard a moment, then burst out into laughter. The man's booming voice echoed through the room. "Hear that, fellas? Midget here wants me to let go of the woman! What'dya say about that?"
Five men, all of similar stature and build
to Beverly's *admirer*, all stood. At that moment, words were not necessary. Jean-Luc and
Beverly caught each other's gaze. They were suddenly into ambiance way over their heads.
Just then, they heard the very familiar, very welcome voice of
Commander Will Riker echoing in the doorway. "See? I told you we'd find the place. I
knew it was around here somewhere." Will, Lieutenant Worf, and Lt. Commander Data
strolled in. It didn't take the trio very long to notice that their Commanding Officer was
about to be thrown through the wall, and their Chief Medical Officer was being held
possessively by a very, very large man. Will smirked slightly, then winked at his
companions. "Play along," he whispered under his breath. His companions nodded
their assent, even though Worf would have preferred a more physical approach to the
situation.
"Beverly! Thank God! I've been looking all over for you! The kids were wondering where you were." Beverly's *admirer* looked between the captain and Will in confusion. Will firmly guided Beverly's captive arm into his own and pulled her towards him, then glared hatefully at the captain. Beverly and Jean-Luc, to their credit, affected surprised looks, playing along with the game.
"Will! I can explain -" Beverly began.
He cut her off angrily. "I thought we agreed you were going to stay away from him. You promised to give our marriage another try, for the sake of our children. Then, the minute I turn my back, you run right back to *him*!" Beverly was speechless as he took her arm and dragged her out the doorway. "Come on. We're leaving. Now." As he led Beverly out of the bar, he glanced over his shoulder. "Hey, Worf," Riker called out. "Bring the bastard my wife seems to like so much along. I want to talk to him."
Worf, catching on as to what was going on, seized the captain by the arm and followed the commander out. Data trailed behind, utterly mystified.
Safely around the corner from the bar, Picard, Crusher, and Riker burst out laughing. Worf eyed them sternly. Data was still pondering. "Commander," he began. "I fail to understand the humor in averting what could possibly have been a tense, violent situation."
Rather than answer, they all laughed
harder.*
With a smile still on her face, she picked up the next letter from the
pile. She had apparently put them all in order long ago, and she was now grateful.
The sun was now high in the afternoon sky, and the
attic was growing uncomfortably warm and muggy. However, she didn't notice as she shifted
positions and read the next letter.
"Beverly,
Others will come, and others will go. But I will always be here, loving
you, and that will never change.
Me"
It was easy to remember when she had gotten this letter. It had been
the day after she had met the newest addition to her staff and, unbeknownst to her,
someone was about to get extremely jealous . . .
*Shore leave had been a welcome respite for the crew of the
Federation's flagship. It had also been a time to say goodbye to crew members who were
leaving the ship to pursue other ventures, as well as to welcome new crew.
Beverly sat at her desk in her office, studying a personnel file on a padd. *Oh, great. Another 'highly recommended, extremely qualified' doctor from Starfleet Medical. Why those bureaucrats insist on sending me these pompous, arrogant know-nothings, I have no idea...*
Dr. Crusher's thoughts drifted back to the last new doctor Starfleet had sent her. He had been under the impression that he was God's gift to medicine. Believing that he had been sent as a "savior," he set out to rescue Sickbay from itself.
He was transferred to Starbase 89 within the week.
Just then, a head popped into the doorway. "Doctor Crusher?"
The deep, masculine voice interrupted her thoughts. She glanced up, studied the man in her doorway, then looked back at the personnel file to confirm her suspicions.
Seeing recognition in her face, he stepped forward into her office and stood in front of her desk. Standing at attention, he said, "Dr. Joseph Anderson, reporting for duty, sir."
*All right, he seems harmless enough...* Beverly stood and came around to the other side of her desk. Extending her hand, she smiled and said, "At ease. Welcome aboard, Dr. Anderson. It's a pleasure to meet you."
He grasped her hand firmly, and his green eyes crinkled slightly at the corners as he returned her smile. "The pleasure is all mine, Dr. Crusher. I've really been looking forward to this assignment. It will be an honor serving such a highly esteemed ship and chief medical officer."
Normally, Beverly would be slightly suspicious of such obvious flattery, but something in his gaze told her he was sincere. Her stance relaxed somewhat. "Come on. I'll give you the grand tour of sickbay. And, barring any unforeseen emergency, I can show you around the ship as well. After all, if you're going to be here for a while, you may as well learn your way around."
Anderson gestured to the doorway, still
smiling. "Lead on, Doctor."
Two hours later, they made their way into Ten Forward, still laughing at an anecdote Anderson had shared with her on the way there. As they slid into a table, a waiter came and took their order, then returned a minute later with their drinks.
"So, what do you think of the Enterprise, Dr. Anderson?" Beverly asked before taking a sip of her lemon tea.
He grinned happily at her, something she now knew was just natural to him. He seemed to be eternally cheerful, with a bright, optimistic outlook on life. "Please, call me Joseph. I'm not exactly the formal type, as you may have already noticed. As for the ship, well, she's a credit to her name. I doubt that I've ever seen such an efficient, well run ship."
"I've served many places in my time with Starfleet, but the Enterprise is really the only place I've called home," Beverly said. Then, she added, "And Joseph, feel free to call me Beverly. We are off duty, after all. I'm not much for formality, either." She smiled, and he smiled back.
And with that declaration, a friendship was born.
=/\=
"Beverly."
No answer. He tried again, this time a bit louder. "Beverly."
She looked up from her coffee, startled out of her thoughts. "Hmm? What?"
He smiled slightly. "Would you like to talk about it?"
"I'm sorry, Jean-Luc. I haven't been a very good breakfast companion this morning." She sighed a bit. "I met the newest addition to my staff yesterday, Dr. Joseph Anderson. He's a very interesting man. After I gave him a tour of the ship, we wound up in Ten-Forward and talked for hours. He was a rather pleasant surprise, after the last doctor Starfleet tried to send me."
Picard felt a slight prickle of dread wander down his spine. "And that's why you've been, um, distracted this morning. He must have made quite an impression."
She grinned. "Yes, he did. In fact, he asked me out for dinner tonight."
"And you accepted?" *Please, please say no,* he thought.
Beverly nodded. "Yes, I did."
Jean-Luc stood and began to clear the breakfast dishes from the table. Not daring to meet her gaze, he said, "Well, then, I hope you have a nice evening tonight."
Beverly noticed the tension in his every move and in his voice. "Jean-Luc, are you all right with this? Because if you're not, I wish you'd tell me."
He forced a relaxed look onto his face.
"Of course I'm all right with it. I only want you to be happy." He glanced at
the chronometer. "We're going to be late. I'll see you later." He quickly made
his escape from his quarters, leaving a rather befuddled Beverly Crusher to stare after
him . . .*
Doll cradle completely forgotten, she made her way to the attic door.
Letters clutched firmly in hand, she made her way down the narrow flight of stairs to the
second floor. Once inside her bedroom, she found a seat in the old rocking chair by the
open balcony doors.
After the mustiness of the attic, the fresh summer breeze was a welcome change. The wind lightly stirred her gray-and-auburn hair and rustled the old pages in the sheaf of letters.
Transferring the one she'd just read to the bottom, her
eyes feasted upon the words lovingly written a quarter century before.
"Beverly,
'Love that's worth fighting for
That's what this is
And how, how could I want more
Than the warmth of your kiss'*
A twentieth century singer said it better than I ever could.
Me"
Footsteps sounded on the stairs, and two children burst through the
open door. "Nana, where have you been? Can't you find it?" a little girl asked.
"Yeah, we've been waiting!" chimed in her older brother.
Startled out of her thoughts, she regarded her grandchildren. Smiling, she said, "Yes, I found it. It's up in the attic, near the middle of the room. You can go up and get it if you'd like."
The words were no sooner out of her mouth than the kids were thundering up to the attic. She smiled fondly after them, amused by their overexuberance.
She returned her attention to her reading, and the intrusion was forgotten.
*"Joseph, dinner was wonderful. I can't thank you
enough," Beverly said, standing in the doorway to her quarters.
"Actually, it is I who should be thanking you. Not many women will agree to go out with me after only knowing me one day. My...honest nature tends to put people off easily."
Beverly looked surprised. "Really? I find it refreshing. And attractive," she added with a mischievous grin.
His eyes crinkled in that way that was becoming so familiar. "Do you, now?"
She nodded, and reached over to run her finger along his jawline. "Mmm hmm."
"Well, in that case, you won't mind if I kiss you good night, will you?"
Without waiting for a response, he moved closer, and his lips descended towards hers. They were warm and soft and completely inviting. Beverly found herself becoming happily lost as his mouth moved over hers.
All too soon, though, the kiss ended, and
Beverly looked up into Joseph's beautiful sea green eyes and smiling face. "Good
night, Beverly," he whispered gently. He then turned and walked back down the
corridor, leaving Beverly to float back into her quarters.
The next morning, Beverly was standing outside the captain's quarters, waiting for the doors to open. After a minute, she pressed the door chime again, beginning to worry.
Finally, the doors opened, revealing a very disheveled Captain Picard. He gestured for her to come in, and as she did so, she looked him over suspiciously. Clad only in uniform pants and socks, unshaven, he was a mess. There were dark circles under his eyes, and the lighting in his quarters was dimmer than usual. "Jean-Luc, are you all right?" Beverly asked, concerned.
"Yes, fine," he rumbled, his voice gravelly. He gestured to the couch, as the table was still not set for breakfast. "I'll be right back."
He disappeared into his bedroom, and emerged a minute later wearing a black t-shirt. He glanced around the living room for a moment, spotted his boots under the desk, grabbed them, and retreated again. Beverly watched all of this, missing nothing.
A short time later, he came back out, this time properly dressed and shaved. "Sorry about that," he muttered, and headed for the replicator.
When they finally sat down for breakfast, Beverly cornered him. "Out with it, Jean-Luc. What did you do last night? You're never like this in the morning."
He picked uninterestedly at his croissant. *Oh, nothing, just sat up all night wondering what you and Dr. Anderson were doing.* Of course, he didn't say that. "I didn't do anything. And I already apologized."
Beverly sighed. *Well, if he wants to be like that, fine!* Before she could say anything, however, his voice broke into her thoughts. "Did you have a nice dinner last night?"
There was an edge to his tone that did not go unnoticed. She chose her words carefully. "Yes, I did. Joseph and I had a good time."
Picard nodded slightly, then went back to picking at his breakfast. Not once, through the rest of the meal, did he meet her gaze again. It only hit Beverly much later what was wrong with her best friend. And the thought left her sitting in her office, frozen in shock.
Captain Jean-Luc Picard was jealous.*
She heard someone calling her name. Pulling herself from her thoughts,
she answered, "I'm up here!"
A moment later, her husband poked his head into the doorway. "You had me worried. I called you for lunch about three times. What have you been up to this afternoon?"
"Reading love letters," she answered, a mischievous grin on her face.
"Love letters? For who?"
"Me. From a rather wonderful, handsome man, I might add, who I still love very much." She held out the pile of letters, and he took them, a suspicious look furrowing his brow.
He looked them over, and his face immediately broke out into a smile. "Where have these been? I'd forgotten about them."
She stood and took them from him, setting them carefully onto the dresser next to her. "I did, too. I found them in the attic when I was looking for something for the kids earlier today."
His arms snaked around her waist. "So you've been sitting here all this time, reading, while I've been out slaving in the hot sun?" he teased.
"Mmm hmm. And you do such a good job of it, too," she shot back. Her arms circled his neck, and he pulled her closer, his lips finding hers.
Husband and wife shared a lengthy kiss, which was interrupted a few minutes later by the sound of giggles coming from their bedroom doorway. They both parted and looked over to find their grandchildren clustered around the doorway, now snickering in earnest.
Noticing that they'd been caught, the kids scampered back down the hallway and downstairs, leaving their grandparents standing there, still in each other's arms, shaking their heads and grinning.
"C'mon, let's go eat lunch before the kids come up
here and drag us back down with them," he said. She nodded, and they headed
downstairs, fingers tightly intertwined.
Later that evening, after her husband had left to take
the grandkids home, she returned to her bedroom. She retrieved the stack of letters and
settled back against the pillows of the high antique bed. She read,
"Beverly,
Words pale in comparison to my feelings for you. There is no describing
how deep my love for you goes. You are my heart and my soul, and without you I am
incomplete.
Me"
*Beverly was still sitting in her office, pondering what to do about her best friend, when the object of that friend's jealousy walked in.
Joseph beamed at her, looking positively exuberant. Without saying a word, he circled around to her side of the desk, pulled her out of her chair, and kissed her, practically lifting her off the floor.
"Goodness, Joseph, what was that for?" Beverly asked breathlessly when he finally released her.
"I just submitted my research project to Starfleet Medical!" he exclaimed, still grinning broadly.
Beverly knew exactly what he was talking about. They had discussed his project over dinner the night before. He had been working on it for over three years, and to finally finish it was a great accomplishment. "Joseph, that's wonderful! I propose we celebrate."
"You're on! Dinner?" he asked.
She nodded. "Definitely. My quarters, 1900 hours?"
He didn't answer her verbally, instead kissing her again, this time with far more gentleness than he had five minutes before.
It was answer enough.
Later that afternoon, Beverly returned to her quarters after her duty
shift. Feeling extremely lighthearted, she soared about her rooms like a bird in flight.
She felt almost giddy, and for no reason, she laughed aloud. It was so nice, having the
attentions of a handsome, virile man again. In fact, her toes were still curled from
Joseph's kiss earlier that day.
It was some time later that Beverly noticed
the message light blinking on her viewscreen. Curious, she turned on the monitor to find a
short message waiting for her.
"Beverly,
You own my heart. My soul is yours. From now 'till eternity, true to my
love for you I'll be.
Me"
A smile lit Beverly's face. *Joseph,* she thought. Her hand tapped her
comm badge. "Crusher to Dr. Anderson."
"Anderson here. What can I do for you, Beverly?" came Joseph's cheerful voice over the comm.
"Actually, I wanted to thank you. The message you sent was wonderful."
There was a pause. "Message?" asked Anderson's puzzled voice.
*He forgot already?* thought Beverly. "The little verse I received on my personal terminal. I assumed it was from you."
"No . . . I didn't send you a message. Though it sounds like a good idea. I may have to try that," he teased. "Looks like you have a secret admirer, Beverly. If it keeps up, I'll get jealous."
His joking tone was lost on her as she tried to figure out who would send her a message like that. Absently, she said, "Okay, Joseph. I'll have to see if I can find out who it is." She cut the comm link and sat down at her desk. *Now, to do some digging . . .*
She began first with the message itself. The cryptic "Me" at the bottom told her nothing, though it implied that she knew the person. That in itself was useful. It narrowed things down a little bit, anyway.
Next, she tried tracing the path of the message back to the source. The search ended at a terminal on deck 23, in a small engineering lounge. No user names or passwords were associated with the terminal. It was open for use to the public, no strings attached.
After searching for several more minutes,
Beverly was almost no better off than when she started. She would simply have to wait for
the next message to arrive.*
Later that night, closer to morning, actually, she awoke. Her husband's
even, calm breathing was the only sound in the room. She carefully got up and walked over
to the balcony doors.
Moonlight shone on the budding fields, grapevines stretching as far as the eye could see. She was tied to this land, by marriage and blood, and by sweat and love. Her wedding had taken place here. One of her children had been conceived here, and another had been born here. In her retirement, she worked alongside her husband in the age-old traditions of the land.
A bit of brightness caught her eye from the darkened
room. Her hand reached out and picked up the stack of letters from the dresser. She
wandered downstairs to the living room and clicked on a small reading lamp. Shuffling
through the papers for a moment, she found the next letter in the series and began to
read.
* "Any luck finding out who your secret admirer is?" Joseph asked after dinner. He began to clear the dishes away, but turned his head to look at her.
She shook her head. "No. None. I tried to track the message down to the sender, but whoever they are, they know how not to be found." She raked a hand through her thick auburn hair and sighed. "It's so frustrating! I'm getting love letters from an anonymous person, Jean-Luc is so jealous of you that right now he's barely speaking to me, Deanna's being nosy about the whole situation . . ." Her hand slapped the table vehemently.
Joseph put the dishes back down and came to her, pulling her out of her chair. He led her wordlessly to the couch and sat her down. Joining her, he lifted her chin with his hand and said, "Look. You're getting all upset about a little love note. Forget about it. If another comes, I'll help you try to track down the sender, okay?" His finger idly traced her jawline, and circled around the hollow of her throat. "Maybe it's your jealous captain friend that sent it. You never know . . ."
Beverly was barely listening by now. Her concentration now centered on Joseph's hand, which was now etching an invisible pattern along her collarbone and further down.
His lips descended upon hers with a fervor that surprised them both. His tongue reached out and explored first her upper lip, then her lower one.
Her mouth opened ardently beneath his, as
she pulled him backwards, resting his body atop hers. Any discussion they had been having
was completely forgotten.
Jean-Luc Picard sat at his desk staring at a stack of parchment-like papers in his hand. These were the real letters that he wanted to send to Beverly, but she would no doubt know they were from him by one glance at his handwriting.
So he instead contented himself with typing them into his terminal and sending them via ship's mail. He had sent the next letter over an hour ago, but the computer indicated that she hadn't yet read it.
He knew she would figure it out eventually. Beverly was anything but stupid, and it wouldn't take a genius to figure out that the letters had started right after she had started seeing that new doctor. The only variable in this scheme of his that he couldn't control was the fact that this Dr. Anderson might claim to be sending the letters himself. That would throw a serious wrench in his plans. He was hoping that Anderson was honest enough to admit that the letters weren't his.
Finally, unable to stand staring at his terminal a minute longer, he called out, "Computer, current location of Dr. Beverly Crusher."
"Dr. Crusher is currently in Crew Quarters 12/4509, assigned to Dr. Joseph Anderson."
Not even desiring to entertain thoughts of
what might be transpiring in the doctor's quarters, Picard retreated to the bridge, and
slipped into his ready room in a futile attempt to lose himself in work until the oblivion
of exhaustion claimed him.*
"Don't tell me you got up this early to read those letters."
She jumped slightly as her husband's voice gently reverberated through the dawn-lightened living room. His hands came up and gently massaged her shoulders. "I didn't think it would take this long just to read a few short love notes."
She smiled and rubbed her cheek against his hand. "It doesn't. But the memories take up their fair share of time. Besides, it's fun taking a trip to the past."
"It is, hmm? I'm glad you're having fun."
"I am. I'm so glad you wrote these." She took his hand in hers and kissed it.
He smiled softly. "I'm glad, too."
*The door chime awakened him. His head snapped up, and he
tried to straighten up. "Come," he called, while surreptitiously rubbing his
neck to get the soreness out.
Beverly took one look at him and sighed loudly. "Jean-Luc," she began reprovingly. "You slept in here last night, didn't you?"
He shook his head. "No, not last night. It was actually this morning."
"Why?"
He wasn't expecting that question. It left him scrambling for an answer. "I, um, had some, uh, work to do last night that couldn't wait. I fell asleep a little while ago, I think."
She came around to the side of the desk and pulled him out of his chair none too gently. "Go to your quarters and go to bed. That's an order, Captain. I might come and check on you, so you'd better be asleep."
"Fine. I'll go, since you made it an order. But that's the only reason." He made a move to step past her, but she refused to budge. "If you want me to go to my quarters, you're going to have to move."
"Jean-Luc, lighten up. You've been behaving like a total ass lately, and I'm getting quite sick of it. If you can't be civil, then stay away from me."
His eyebrow rose slightly. "I beg your pardon, Beverly, but you're the one who barged in here and ordered me to bed. I'm merely complying. If that isn't civil enough for you, I'm sorry."
He once again tried to step around her. This time she moved to let him pass. But she wasn't through with him. "You're jealous," she stated.
He refused to meet her gaze, instead choosing to look at his fish swimming peacefully in its tank. "Jealous? What could I possibly be jealous of?"
Her hand came out of nowhere and grasped his face, forcing him to look at her. Her eyes were blistering. "I don't know, Jean-Luc. You tell me," she spat sarcastically.
Without a backward glance, she exited the
ready room.
Beverly stormed furiously down the corridors of the ship. *How dare he play dumb with me!* her mind screamed. The doors to sickbay parted for her, mechanically getting the hell out of her way before she knocked them down. Her staff, sensing her mood, did likewise and made themselves scarce. All except Joseph.
He pulled her into her office and closed the door. "What's wrong, Beverly?"
"Nothing. I'll work it out. Don't worry about it." She studied him for a moment, then frowned. "Joseph, is something wrong with *you*? You look positively glum. What happened?"
He studied his carefully polished boots, then looked up at her gaze. "Starfleet accepted my research project," he muttered unhappily.
She was up and had her arms around him in
seconds. "That's wonderful!" she exclaimed. His facial expression didn't change.
"Isn't it?"
"No. Along with the acceptance, I received transfer orders to
Starfleet Medical. I've been given a research grant to continue my studies, as well as my
own staff." He paused. "I don't want to leave you," he said, and hugged her
tightly.
She kissed him softly. "But this is what you've always wanted. What you told me you wanted that first day you were here. You can't turn down the dream of a lifetime for one person." Her heart ached as she said the words, but she saw the truth in them. She would forever feel guilty if she didn't encourage him to go.
"I have to think about it," he said softly. "Will you give me some time?"
She nodded. "Of course I will. And please, think about what I said."
"I will."
He turned and walked out of her office, leaving her there to bury her head in her hands. Why did this always happen to her?
Unfortunately, she didn't have an answer.*
They spent the day wrapped up in a blanket by the fire, watching the
rain roll down the windows, and listening to the distant thunder rumble through the heavy
gray skies.
He had dozed off moments before; she now took advantage
of the quiet moment to pull out the final letter. This was the one that made everything
clear to her so many years ago. It wasn't the content of the letter that explained
everything, but rather the signature. Instead of the cryptic "Me" at the bottom
of the letters, there was finally a name.
"Beverly,
'You put your heart up on a shelf
I know it's hard to be by yourself
You need someone that's true and strong
Baby someone just came along
I am that man
You're trying to find
I am that man
You had in mind
And I'll give you all my love
'Til you understand
I won't give up
'Cause I know
I am'**
Don't be afraid to give love another try. I've been here for over
twenty years, and I don't plan on going anywhere any time soon. I love you, and I always
will.
Jean-Luc"
*Joseph was gone.
Beverly had seen him off after they temporarily docked at Starbase 17
to drop him off. Their goodbye had been bittersweet, at best. He was going off to fulfill
his dream, and she was once again saying goodbye to someone she cared for.
Cared for. But never once was the word
"love" mentioned between either of them.
She wandered listlessly back to her quarters. She just knew that Deanna
was going to come after her to *discuss* her feelings, and she knew that she would just
tell the Counselor, albeit politely, to leave her the hell alone.
How Beverly desperately wished to talk to Jean-Luc. However, he hadn't spoken to her since their argument a few days before. She longed to throw herself into his comforting arms and simply let him hold her until the pain went away. Instead, she settled for her couch, where she threw herself face-first and stared blankly at the door.
The door chime jolted her out of her thoughts, and a piece of paper slid underneath the door. She wearily got up and picked up the paper.
When she got to the name at the bottom, she
began to cry.
Picard had been half-expecting the chime of the door, but when it finally came, his heart gave a wild jump. "Come," he said hesitantly, now not knowing what to expect.
He looked up to see Beverly standing in his doorway, clutching a piece of paper in her hand. Her face was still wet from the tears she had shed, and her hand shook slightly.
Years seemed to pass between them when their eyes met. Then, suddenly, she was in his arms. Neither of them spoke, but simply held each other.
It was all they needed.*
She set the final letter down and hugged the blanket tighter around them. He awakened, instinctively knowing that she needed to be held.
As the fire snapped and flickered brightly, two lovers, husband and wife, best friends, shared love and warmth in each other's embrace, as they had for all these years.
The storm raged on outside. But inside, Jean-Luc and Beverly Picard knew heaven.
And it was enough.
* To Be Loved By You" by Wynonna, from the album "Revelations" by Curb/MCA
Records
** "I Am That Man" by Brooks and Dunn, from the album "Borderline" by
Arista Records