Sometimes we have to "criticize" other people. That may be part of our job; to help people who are working for us. Sometimes we need to criticize a person we care about, because we know they need to change for the better. I present here five ideas to soften the impact, and aid in bringing about needed change. State them very clearly, and do it at the very beginning of the discussion. You are setting the agenda, and it clearly does not including "hanging" the person who made the mistake!

1. You are not intent upon blaming or punishing the other person. "I'm here to solve a problem." (State this 1st!)
2. What went wrong? (Ask, or a Statement)
3. How do we fix it?
4. Why did it go wrong?
5. How do we prevent it from happening again?

When criticism is presented this way, the other person does not feel as threatened, and is much more likely to listen with an open mind. He senses you are truly trying to help him (you are!). Defensiveness drops. You pull the other person into the process of problem solving. They tend to take ownership in the discussion, and in the solution! I have used these ideas in supervising engineers. It works.

Mr. Andrews

 

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