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Bridgton Highlands Golfer
I’m a Bridgton Highlands golfer
Swingin’s
what I’ve got to do
I turn my shoulders
and I bend my knees,
Then hit the ball into the trees.
I’ve
taken many many lessons
Practiced hours on the tee,
Hoped to play and be a champion
Just to win a trophy
Seems
that it’s never meant to be!
Bye Bye Golfball
Pack my clubs and my chapeau
Here I go, swingin’
low
Bye, Bye, golf ball
Everybody waits for me
‘Cause I sliced one off the tee
Bye, Bye, golf ball.
No
one here can love, or even stand me
I play all alone out on the prairie
Take my cart, don’t be polite
I’ll
arrive late tonight
Golf ball, bye, bye.
The Eagle Song
Cruising down the fairway,
Can’t believe
I hit so good!
The ball it flew; it’s rolling, too,
Oh, how I love that wood.
Another hundred yards, and
I
flew onto the green.
With luck, it bounced and dropped in
That was really quite a scene.
I’ve got it made,
for this I prayed
I always knew I could.
Just like the “pros”
my practice shows
The way a golfer’s
should.
Just played the perfect hole, and
My score will surely drop.
Move on and play the next one
Just before
my luck can stop!
The Glory of Golf
You’ve gotta win a little, lose a little
You’ve gotta
get the golfin’ blues a little,
That’s the story of, that’s the glory of golf.
You’ve gotta
hook a little, slice a little
And sometimes even hit ‘em twice a little,
That’s the story of, that’s
the glory of golf.
And when this game gets through to us
You’ll love this game with all its charm.
And
when the world is through with us
We’ll still have a strong left arm.
You’ve gotta wink a little, drink
a little
And all those putts, you’ve gotta sink a little.
That’s the story of, that’s the glory of
golf.
Golfer’s Etiquette
When to the links you go
There are certain things to know.
Never talk or
hum or sing
When a golfer starts to swing.
Never let your shadow fall
Across another’s putting ball
Never
doubt an opponent’s score,
You saw 6 but mark it 4!
Never kick one from the rough
Play it fair when luck
is tough.
Never cheat in deepest wood,
God is watching, so be good.
Never raise your voice or swear
When you top
or fan the air.
Never, even as a joke
Fail to count each single stroke.
Don’t improve a hanging lie
“Accidentally”
- on the sly.
In a sand trap, it’s a rub
Never, never ground your club.
When a foursome presses you,
Don’t
be nasty, let them through.
When you tear the sod, don’t frown,
Put some sand back in the ground.
Do all
these things and then, Old Kid,
You’ll be the first who ever did!
Grand Old Game
Golf’s a
grand old game, just a frustrating game
But forever and ever I’ll play.
I may hit in the lake, or into the woods,
Or
whiff and just leave the ball lay.
But I’ll play and play and then maybe someday
I’ll come in with a real
good score.
So here’s to shanks and whiffs and hooks,
May they leave me forevermore.
The Hazard
I
drove my ball far down the fairway.
It was such a beautiful shot.
It bounced and then rolled in a hazard.
Now what
was that rule I was taught?
Bring back, oh bring back,
Bring back my little white ball to me.
Bring back, oh
bring back,
I’ll hit it again for a three!
Hello Golfers
Hello golfers, well, Hello golfers
It’s
so nice to have us all together again
You’re looking swell golfers, playing well golfers
You are driving, you
are chipping ,
you are putting strong.
And when we Southern players
leave you Northern stayers
We hope it will
stay nice and warm up here, so
Get out and hit that ball, golfers
Thin, fat, short and tall golfers
Bridgton will
welcome you all back next year
I’ve Been Working On My Golf Game
I’ve been working on my golf
game
Since the snow went away.
I’ve been looking in the tall grass
Where the ball just seems to stay.
Every
time I get a good one,
That’s what brings me back.
Then I went to see the Pro, and
Now I’m right on track!
Ball
won’t you go?
Ball won’t you fly?
Ball won’t you get into that hole?
Ball won’t you go?
Ball
won’t you fly
Roll right in that hole!
It’s the Good Old Golfing Time
It’s the
good old golfing time,
It’s the good old golfing time,
Grab your clubs and putter, too
We tee off at nine.
We’ll
drive and chip and putt away,
This game is simply divine!
I’m glad I chose to play today
In the good old golfing
time.
Ladies Day
Ladies’ Day, I’m so excited ‘cause it’s Ladies’ Day
I’m
so delighted ‘cause I’m gonna play, big hooray
Hope that I recall, just how to hit that ball on
Ladies’
Day, I’m very nervous
And I’ll try not to delay.
And though I just have been,
I’ve gotta go again,
Nervous, ‘cause it’s Ladies’ Day.
My Wild Flying Ball
My wild, flying ball
Lies in the
rough so tall.
I can search far and near,
But it doesn’t appear,
Not my wild flying ball.
My wild flying
ball
Still in the grass so tall.
I guess it is lost;
More strokes it will cost
Because of my wild flying ball!
Oh,
What a Beautiful Morning
Oh, what a beautiful morning,
Oh, what a beautiful day.
I’ve got a wonderful feeling,
This
is a day I can play!
There are bright-colored balls
on the fairway;
And the one with the best lie
is mine.
I’m
swinging so clean, as I
reach for the green,
And there I feel just like a Putting Machine!
Oh, what a beautiful
morning
Oh, what a beautiful day.
I’ve got a wonderful feeling,
Everything’s going my way!
Off We Go
Off we go onto the lower fairways
Nice and
green, see the RAVINE
Off we go
into the woods and water
Obstacles
worse than we've seen
Plan your
shot with every care and caution
Tee it high,
watch it go up
With lots
of luck and even skill
The ball
will roll right in the small cup.
Over There
Over there, over there
I
keep hitting the ball over there.
Because the shanks are coming
The shanks are coming
And I’m succumbing to
despair.
Oh beware, I’ll say a prayer, if I shank it again, I will swear.
I shanked it over, right in the clover.
I
took the club straight back
But I drove ‘er over there.
Playing at the Bridgton Highlands
I’ll
say hooray to my game today,
Playing at the Bridgton Highlands.
I got 3 pars and drove real far,
Playing at the Bridgton
Highlands.
Even cleared a ravine; my ball could be seen,
Playing at the Bridgton Highlands.
Oh, what a day, I’m
glad I could play
With my friends at the Bridgton Highlands.
Take Me Out To The Golf Course
Take me out
to the golf course
Take me out to the club.
Buy me some golf balls and
Colored tees, I’ll
Go over the water
and
Through the trees. Then it’s
Swing and whiff on the fairway, that
Little old cup is my goal, and it’s
One,
two, three drinks for par at the
Nine-teenth hole!
That Old Game of Mine
Not a soul out on the fairways,
That’s
a pretty certain sign,
These rainy days are breaking up
That old game of mine.
All my friends are either shopping,
Or
they’re cleaning all the time,
These rainy days are breaking up
That old game of mine.
There goes Jill,
there goes Lee,
By the clubhouse door.
Bet they do the same as me,
Putting on the floor.
Gee I get that lonesome
feeling
When I know it’s golfing time;
These rainy days are breaking up
That old game of mine.
This
Ol’ Gal
1. This ol’ gal, she played one,
Saw that orange Top Flite run,
Chorus
With a knick
knack paddy whack,
Add another a stroke;
Soon your score will be a joke!
2. This ol’ gal, she played two,
Drove
the ball into the goo,
3. This ol’ gal, she played three,
Hear the “crack,” she hit a tree,
4.
This ol’ gal, she played four,
Whiffed it once,
she swung once more,
5. This ol’ gal, she played
five,
Putted well, she’s still alive,
6. This ol’ gal, she played six,
Reached into her bag of tricks,
7.
This ol’ gal, she played seven,
Ohmigosh, she shot “eleven,”
8. This ol’ gal, she played
eight,
What do you know,
she hit it straight,
9. This ol’ gal, she played nine,
Didn’t lift up,
she hit it fine,
We’ll
be Playing Golf
We’ll
be playing golf at Bridgton
When we can
(when we can),
We’ll
be playing golf at Bridgton
When we can
(when we can),
We’ll
be playing golf at Bridgton
Tho’
it often isn’t easier
We’ll
be playing golf at Bridgton
When we can
(when we can).
We’ll
be playing rounds on Wednesdays
If we can
(if we can).
We’ll
be playing rounds on Wednesdays
If we can
(if we can).
We’ll
be playing rounds on Wednesdays
And we hope
there won’t be rain days
We’ll
be playing rounds on Wednesdays
If we can
(if we can).
We might
even shoot a bogey
When we can
(when we can,.
We might
even shoot a bogey
When we can
(when we can),
We might
even shoot a bogey
But we’ll
never be fogey
We might
even shoot a bogey
When we can
(when we can).
On a great
day we’ll get birdies
If we can
(if we can),
On a great
day we’ll get birdies
If we can
(if we can),
On a great
day we’ll get birdies
So our score
is in the thirties
On a great
day we’ll get birdies
If we can (if we
can).
(When You Wore A Tulip)
When you were a loser and I was a winner,
I thought things were really
great.
Now you’re the winner and I am the loser,
What an awful quirk of fate!
There must be a reason; it’s
just not my season,
My scores have been OH SO BAD.
So I will cheer for your winnings and
Wait for my innings, and
Try
not to look so sad!
The Wiffenpoof Song
I’m just getting older, I can’t hit so far
Whiff,
Whiff, Whiff
I’m afraid it I move, I won’t connect at all
Whiff, Whiff, Whiff.
All the good golfers they
swing nice and free
They hit the ball to eternity.
Lord have mercy on such as me
Whiff, Whiff, Whiff
You can't
get to Heaven
O, you can't get to Heaven
Playing in the rough,
St. Peter will say
It’s not enough! (repeat
4 lines)
I ain’t gonna grieve my Lord no more.
I ain’t gonna grieve my Lord no more (3 times)
2.
Driving off the tee,... You gotta bring me!
3. Just hitting a ball,...You gotta give your all!
4. Riding in
a cart,...You gotta live smart
5. If you're playing too slow,...
Where's your get up and go?
You’re
a Grand Old Ball
You’re a grand old ball; just a high-flying ball
And forever and ever you roll.
You’re
the symbol of the game I love,
A part of my heart and my soul.
I will chip and putt, even hit from a rut
‘Though
I’m not one to boast or brag.
Should old acquaintance be forgot
Keep your eye on the eighteenth flag.
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Copyright © CLS Productions 2008
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