My Fourth list of Top Ten Lists
Top ten ways you know you are the new Attorney General.
The top ten reasons Hillary will be next President.
Top ten signs America is responsible for your torture.
Top Ten ways Barack is like a Disney Fairytale.
Top ten ways you know you are the new Attorney General.
10. You now have a prepaid life time subscription to S & M monthly.
09. Your body feels so much lighter without a soul.
08. A large framed picture of Sargent Schultz hangs on the wall behind
your desk.
07. In the presence of the president. You have the urge to chase your
ass, and lick your balls.
06. You view the Constitution of the United States through Kool-aid
goggles.
05. You have document stamps that read “QUAINT” and “QUITE
QUAINT”.
04. Cheney always serves you chianti and fava beans with dinner.
03. Your dream of breaking the record of saying “I don't recall”
in one sitting, is just one congressional hearing away.
02. You no longer have to hide your love of T.I.Ts.
And the number one way you know you are the new Attorney
General is.........
01. Your lips have been successfully grafted to George Bush's ass.
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The top ten reasons
Hillary will be the next President
10. For a monster her personally is quite affable.
09. She is the best method actor in all of Congress.
08. By all accounts, she knows what the definition of is is.
07. Her hair hides her ears.
06. After all she was the one who provided the lubricant to slick
his willy.
05. She can find a vast conspiracy in the ass of a piss ant.
04. Like revenge, she honestly believes that a good waffle is best
served cold.
03. She has an advance degree in passive aggressive victimology.
02. She never breaks the first commandment. She only worships Karl
Rove.
And the number reason Hillary Clinton will be the next president
is.
01. Experience!! 35 years of dealing with the low life skanks and
hos Bill has dragged into their lives.
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Top ten signs America is responsible for your torture.
10. They show you your genealogy tree. Which traces your Al Qaeda
roots all the way back to Derna, Tripoli circa 1805.
09. You are read your constitutional rights in English and Spanish.
08. The doctor sent to monitor your torture refuses to treat you until
your HMO gives him the OK.
07. You learn that the Geneva Accords are fairytales told to naive
enemy combatants.
06. Miss South Carolina explains to you exactly why you are being
tortured.
05. Everyone repeats the Zen mantra, It's only torture if you think
it is torture.
04. You are constantly reminded that torture is like playground basketball.
No harm no foul.
03. WWJD is everywhere in the interrogation room. What would Jack
Bauer do.
02. Everyone calls you Toto and tells you, “You are not in Kansas
any more.”
And the number one way you know you are being tortured by
America is...........
01. They never use tap water when they water board you.
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Top Ten ways Barack
is like a Disney Fairytale
10. He had a nasty villainess who wears pants suits and rides around in limousines.
09. He actually won despite tremendous odds, simply because he recited 'yes I can'. Quite
often.
08. Simba meet Barack. Barack meet Simba.
07. Did you see the first democratic debate, How Snow White could you get.
06. He wished so very hard that it all became true.
05. He's offering to share the political meatball with the Lady.
04. Until recently all the characters on the stage were white.
03. His villain's mirror had been lying to her for years.
02. Like 'Song of the South', Rev Wright is loved. But just to embarrassing to let back
out into the public.
And the number way Barack is like a Disney Fairytale is..................
01. It's the Ears.
All by B. Bell
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