The "You are the Sum of your Distractions" Theory of Life
by Anita Sands Hernandez --- mother of four!

This is a game we all can play. We are going to score ourselves and our kids to see
the SUCCESS QUOTIENT that they are showing already. You can play scoring
yourself, as you WERE when you were young, or you can score your CHILDREN
for how they are today. Or if you're young, score yourself for your own habits

WE all start with l00 points if the IQ is NORMAL, and the BODY is energetic and
NORMAL and your daddy's not a multi-millionaire just an average unfunded Joe.
SOME of us do start out with about 150 points if our daddy's rich but those kids
can still zoom downwards into the ground if they have enough timewaster activities.
So now we start our SCORE. Get a pad and a pencil. We are going to subtract
POINTS for all time or money wasters that you do, did as a kid, or that your kids
do now or if you're young, which YOU DO NOW. Remember we need something
to compare it to. After school, the young Bill Gates did not watch tv. Well, not
literal TV. Young Bill worked on his infernal chip-run-typewriters with t.v.
monitors attached, out in the garage. Dad bought him anything he needed to
continue doing that.

you're healthy, able and intelligent child spends more than one hour a day watching
t.v. for pleasure and amusement, or a PC screen for dumb chats or to visit silly
websites, they are edging into the MINDLESS ZONE. This is an addictive territory.
Humanity's many styles of Cyber helmets and virtual thrills involving mental
diddling, end up being a big brain drain. It is the opposite of expanding the MIND
unles it's JOAN OF ARCADIA, FRIDAY nites, CBS..a fab teen show. TV is
VEGETATING THE MIND, teaching passivity! So, we subtract FIVE POINTS
from the initial l00 FOR EACH HOUR THEY WATCH THE BOX. (we refer to
videoboxes, boomboxes, radio boxes, any BOX that one can stick on ears or
eyeballs to veg out.) Do your subtracting right here in the margin. GUYS. This is a
FIVE POINTER……………………. + or -


FOR GIRLS a big timewaster is self-beautifying. IF your female child spends more
than one HALF hour a day doing GROOMING AND WARDROBE activities, she
is not going to make it in life. She may look good when she's a pretty, young teen
and she may get some social thrills and nail a guy and breed but it's an unproductive
lifelong trend as nailing an admiring man is not a LASTING job, (PROVEN!) and
it's such a bad career choice, but it's one that pretty women frequently MAKE.

Hair arranging, finger nail appointments, facial masques at 15$ a jar, styling goo or
hair slick, l0$ a tube, shampooing, cutting, setting hair in rollers, drying and dying,
styling and spraying hair adds up to SERIOUS money too and subtracts both time
and cash from one's entire lifespan. DOING 15 minutes of that, and doing it
YOURSELF (instead of paying) occasionally is OK but going out and getting it
done at great expense simply shows us you have too much time and probably too
much of somebody else's money on your hands.

If little Petulia's out shopping for new clothes when her closets already bulge, she
is verging into compulsivebehavior. GROOMING and WARDROBE activities are
always extremely costly (and turn compulsive or obsessive on us very easily as they
twine with our fears, our desires, our hormones too.) This adds up to much grief,
lost money and time in later life. SO, for TIME AND MONEY LOST.
If she can groom in less than 15, give her a plus 5 points!

2.A) THE BODY QUOTIENT (BOYS). The male analogue of this is fixing the
car, oddly enough. Not the body. CARS are an extension of men's bodies. Now in
all truth. A car can be fixed with a once a year tune-up. Unless you plan a career in
motor work, tinkering with cars, motorcycles, bikes, their parts and accessories can
be a big time waster. ANOTHER BODY obsession is sports. A passion about
sports and winning at sports is not going to spell success in life. Did Ross Perot play
any kind of ball? NO, so there you are! School gives us one class a day in PHYS.
ED. That's all anybody needs to stay fit. It's enough of a dose of sports to make a
rounded life. AFTER SCHOOL SPORTS do not make the Donald Trumps of
Tomorrow. This obsession about being on the team, being the admired player is as
neurotic as girls curling their eyelashes or lipsticking their mouths every few hours.
It is a sure sign of and even leads to career failure later in life. SUBTRACT TEN
POINTS for EACH HOUR SONNY BOY does either car/vehicle or sports, in his
average day.

3.) EAT TO LIVE, DON'T LIVE TO EAT. If your children eat out at restaurants/
cafes or fast food more than twice a week, they are not using their own skills and
their own kitchen or probably their own CASH and they're sure not using it
correctly! That SET of habits will help them to be INDIGENT and under nourished
one day when you're not paying the bills. A slice of a dead cooked greasy body on
white bread is not nutrition or haven't you heard? Kid, stay in your own kitchen, at
home, take raw carrots, some GREENS, some tuna, some protein, some vegies, fix
it fast and eat it while you do home work and while you listen to the news. That's a
good meal for all the orifices we've got. The empty brain is filled, the belly is filled.
MANAGING our holes is how we get to the top. A man who manages them well is
HOLY. The kid who learns that lesson early in life will surely go places. The kid
that's wasting Dad's hard-earned money at fast food joints is a careless idiot.
that kid learns to eat at home while he studies.

4.) HOW ARE THEY HANGING? IF Junior spends more than one hour a day
with his male friends, let's call a spade a spade……Junior is 'hanging out.' HANG is
not a pleasant verb. It's what we do to criminals. As GEORGE GILDER has said in
many of his books, the young miscreant male gets worse by hanging with others of
his kind. Men are basically sociopaths and put a bunch of them together you got
BUT, hear this, you may SCORE FIVE PLUS POINTS if he hangs with
ADULTS, doing special endeavors or projects (other than billiards, cars, reading
sex magazines.)

5.) Magazines and Video Games - Big time wasters and very expensive, too.
If you're zoning on VOGUE magazine or TEEN or playing BOZO BOARD
GAMES or VIDEO GAMES, you are showing us that you like to be a vegetable.
More than a half hour a day, we subtract FIVE POINTS. Better you should eat
vegetables than be one.

6.) YAMMER YAMMER vs. the BLAH BLAH PATROL - If that kid's on the
telephone yammering, and it's not a three minute call, he's a talkaholic.
SUBTRACT FIVE POINTS for every hour a day he does it.

INCREASING AREAS, the mark of a HERO, a future tycoon. Before we were
involved with POINT-subtracting but there are PLUS-SCORING ACTIVITIES.
When we have a kid --- say, --- who does real fast GROOMING, NO EATING
junkfood in the STREET, NO sociopath HANGING OUT, NO TV watching. Well
this kid has time to use to STUDY, to attract scholarships, time to DO
HOMEWORK or special school projects, to join special interest groups either at
school or at the local ceramic shop. He may have an after school job to earn money
for college. (better be under the table work as colleges won't give you student
grants if you show income!) He may pursue hobbies and learning goals. HOBBIES
often lead children into special fascinations, where they do special studies on their
own, unbidden by authority figures. Those kids are tomorrow's intellectual giants,
action prone individuals. Winners. So now we get to THE PLUSES.

These are the time users that look good on a resume and get us into the really hot
colleges. These special interest clubs often involve socializing or 'hanging out' and
they involve creativity, art pursuits and even --amusement. Hey that's not an evil
word. AMUSEMENT is good. These POWER activities can frequently be
combined with festive 'meals out' and socializing. So fun comes to them who
PURSUE E.C.S.A. The ability to combine EXTA CURRICULAR activities with
PLEASURE and socializing is a major plus. SCORE FIVE POINTS FOR EACH
the score if it's become a major fascination, like Bill Gates and those typewriters.
Like Britney dancing for church skits.

2.) BODY-RELATED HOBBIES - If she's sewing and he's building a vehicle,
HOBBIES. She's still hung up on beauty, grooming and wardrobe and being
admired and he's still on the size and brilliance of his car. These are body
extensions. BUT they are starters toward doing more meaningful hobbies. Score

2.A) HOBBIES- IF there are hobbies that involve doing something creative,
artistic, socially helpful, like painting, art, computers or helping adults, SCORE
FIVE POINTS for each hour a DAY that this hobby is done. PC PARENTS: If the
kid is chatting on the PC or ICQ, subtract five points for each hour a day this
hobby is pursued. If one chats in a foreign language, I'll relent and let you add two
points. But do you think your kid's gonna tell you the truth about PC chats? Watch
what the kid does from a nearby chair for an hour. Then score accordingly.

3.) INTERESTING AFTER SCHOOL JOB?- Add five points if it's a fabulous
job where the kid learns something. Interns at a law office, or works in daycare
with children. Add 2 points if it's a schlub job done for money that's on the
BOOKS. Take into account that COLLEGE GRANTs aren't granted to kids who
show income. You gotta have a clean slate. NO MONEY on the record. SCORE
FIVE POINTS if the kid has figured that out and works UNDER THE TABLE,
detailing cars, landscaping, baby sitting, massaging old people at the old age home,
cooking pies for a local café.

4.) THE PARENT THE KID HAS -Score Plus five (+5) for every positive
affirming habit that the child's PARENT has IN RELATION TO THE KID. We're
talking about 'in relation to the kid'. Like carrying her to Dancing school on
Saturdays. Like taking him to Hebrew School. Does the parent drive that child to
the museum, the piano lesson, thusly creating the kid's beng great? Does he /she
AFFIRM the kid's heroism? Does he/she praise the child's stick-to-it-iveness and
notice when this occurs? Does he look for clues that there are brains in junior and
re-affirm 'you're a smart one'? Does the parent have a hawk eye for the child's
confronting life's realities? Parents can get lazy and stop seeing good stuff. Many
parents only tend to hear the yells and squawks and scream negatively and not even
notice the smooth times, hence they forget to re-inforce the positives, which
un-fertilized, may slow down to a stop.

Every time that parent sees a PLUS, it's good to comment positively. JUST seeing
that the child is heroic, assertive, handles reality or is kind, hard working is NOT
enough. The parent has to comment on it … go on record for having noticed. Gifts,
rewards are nice sometimes, too. But every plus can't be followed immediately by a
cash prize. They must be spontaneous, unexpected, hence not every time. You're
not teaching a beagle to beg or leap through a hoop as a trick. You're just
duplicating what LIFE is going to do later, give positive feedback for positive
behavior, frequently.


70-80 is a low score. Teach the kid fast to fill out a Welfare Form. Basically the
DPSS want a letter from a DOCTOR telling them why he is not able to work. So
you might get your child to a doctor now --- a PSYCHIATRIST--- and get him
used to malingering officially. Maybe get him some SSI or ATD right now. (Aid to
the totally disabled.) Of course if you can't pay his medical bills, junior had better
start thinking how HE can find such a doctor, also how he can live on 300$ a
month after you're out of the picture and he's living on this generous AID stipend
which basically is half of an entry level, minimum wage job. Also, what's he gonna
do 24 hrs a day for the rest of his life. Big hole there. Point that out to him. Then
Suggest the ARMY.

80-90 This kid obviously doesn't have a lot of time wasters. Great. He's a Potential
Bureaucrat. Post Office, DEA, Cop, Fireman, Intake worker, Member of Congress

100- THIS SCORE has to be analyzed carefully. It could mean the child is not
doing any time wasting yet at the same time that he's not doing anything TRULY
POSITIVE either. If that's the case, the kid is a FLATLINER and has to be told,
"Hey sonny, you're coasting with the original equipment. You have l00 thousand
miles free then it's downhill from there, chum. You have NOT made enough of an
effort to develop your muscle and surpass the pack. Your learning curve is flat as
the pavement of that alley behind the house. When your pistons blow, you will find
yourself working at the post office. If you're LUCKY.

(AN IMPORTANT DISTINCTION - The l00 score could mean the child's time
wasters are cancelled out by SOMEgrowth activities. THIS is a very busy kid. He
lives hard and fast. Eats out, watches t.v. plays on the PC (both stupid chat rooms
and valuable web surfing), then zones it on PC games, shops, fixes cars, slicks and
pomades the hair like the Fonz yet gives time to the Red Cross and has a job after
school. Give him A for spunk. If he's not doing it on Dr. Pepper or Ritalin keep
feeding him whatever you're feeding him, and start talking about what his little
motor could do if it were POINTED in some really high altitude direction. Get this
kid lessons, teachers, gurus. One day this child will support you!)

130 Pretty good score. You are making big efforts and there aren't many time
wasters. You will probably get there. You can actually maybe attain what you
dream of, destiny, life, career-wise.

160 Ted Turner, Ross Perot, Elan Musk, Einstein move over!

Remember the words of the famed Spiritual teacher, KRISHNAMURTI who
SAID: "what is of importance is the (sad) fact that you obey and allow your
judgement to be perverted by authority. Your judgement, your mind, your
affection, your life are being perverted by things which have no value, and herein
lies sorrow." In other words, Kid, if you're reading this, you have allowed a legion
of junk to take over your mind, to occupy or frazzle it. You are no longer master in your
own home. Cut these chronic themes out. Show them the door. Change habits.

And Mom, Pop? If you are reading this. YOU ARE an AUTHORITY figure, right?
Well guess what. You pervert him and make him powerless if you step in, tell him
what to do, like cut off the t.v. and Playboy Mag subscription, etc. Right? Cuz you step
into the terrain of being Hitler. Knowing that you can't make the changeover for
him makes it hard to just step in and tell your children to lose the Tostitos, chronic
TV, the blaring music, the frivolous hanging out and all the other compulsions they
have -- and get focused. When you say "Kids, Get a life! they are more likely to go
get a death just to thwart you. At least if they're strong kids, they will.

So here's what you do. Kindly, sweetly, prepare junior a tall tasty drink and put
him front of this PC and have him read this test. Tell him he gets a fiver if he
answers all the questions and scores himself. if he has half a brain, he'll get the
impact of the "YOU ARE THE SUM OF YOUR DISTRACTIONS" theory of life.
THAT ALONE will make him become a self starter.

Next, very unobtrusively, while you're at it, lose the Premium Cable, the celebrity
workship magazines, the weekly mall movies. Use the time freed up for family
library visits! Rent great art films and or history-teaching, soul-wrenching films and
encourage kids to invite pals over, watch them at home. Gandhi, Under Fire,
Missing, Amadeus. Gone with the Wind.