The "You are the Sum TOTAL of your Distractions" Theory of Life
by Anita Sands Hernandez astrology @ earthlink .net
This is a game we all can play. We are going to score ourselves and our kids to see the SUCCESS QUOTIENT that our children already show. You can play two ways: a.) scoring yourself, as you WERE when you were young, or b.) you can score your CHILDREN for how they are today. If you're a young person reading this, score yourself (truthfully, now,) for your own habits. If you're stressed from multiple kids, just read it, don't score anybody. Just do a mental 'air check' on your offspring.

ALL ENTRANTS will all start with l00 points if the IQ is NORMAL, and the BODY is energetic and NORMAL and the Daddy's not a multi-millionaire --just an average unfunded Joe. TRUE, SOME of us do start out with about 150 points if our daddy's rich and our momma's good lookin' but those kids can still zoom downwards into the ground if they have enough timewaster activities!

So now we start our SCORE. Get a pad and a pencil. We are going to subtract POINTS for all time or money wasters that you do, did as a kid, or that your kids do now or if you're young, which YOU DO NOW. Remember we need something to compare it to. After school, the young Bill Gates did not watch tv. Well, not literal TV. Young Bill worked on his infernal chip-run-typewriters with t.v. sets attached, in the garage. Dad bought him anything he needed to continue doing that.

 1.) THE KILLER BOX QUOTIENTi.e. our PC and TELEVISION HABITS. If you're healthy, able and intelligent child spends more than one hour a day watching t.v. for pleasure and amusement, or a PC screen for dumb chats or to visit silly websites, they are edging into the MINDLESS ZONE. This is an addictive territory. Humanity's many styles of  mental tickle really end up being a big brain drain. It is the opposite of expanding the MIND; it is VEGETATING THE MIND. So, we subtract FIVE POINTS from the initial l00 FOR EACH HOUR THEY WATCH THE BOX. (we refer to Ipod boxes, videoboxes, boomboxes, radio boxes, any BOX that one can stick on ears or eyeballs to veg out.) Do your subtracting right here in the margin. GUYS. This is a FIVE POINTER……………………. + or -


FOR GIRLS a big timewaster is self-beautifying. IF your female child spends more than one HALF hour a day doing GROOMING AND WARDROBE activities, she is not going to make it in life. She may look good when she's a pretty, young teen and she may get some social thrills and nail a guy and breed but it's an unproductive, lifelong trend as nailing an admiring man is not a LASTING job, (PROVEN!) and it's such a bad career choice, but it's one that pretty women frequently MAKE.

Hair arranging, finger nail appointments, facial masques at 15$ a jar, styling goo or hair slick, l0$ a tube, shampooing, cutting, setting hair in rollers, drying and dying, styling and spraying hair adds up to SERIOUS money too and subtracts both time and cash from one's entire lifespan. DOING 15 minutes of that, and doing it YOURSELF (instead of paying) occasionally is OK but going out and getting it done at great expense simply shows us you have too much time and probably too much of somebody else's money on your hands.

 If little Petulia's out shopping for new clothes when her closets already bulge, she is verging into compulsive behavior. GROOMING and WARDROBE activities are always extremely costly (and go compulsive or obsessive on us very easily as they twine with our fears, our desires, our hormones too.) This adds up to much grief, lost money and time in later life. SO, for TIME AND MONEY LOST. SUBTRACT TEN POINTS FOR EACH HOUR SHE DOES any of these A DAY. If she can groom in less than 15, give her a plus 5 points!

 2.A) THE BODY QUOTIENT (BOYS). The male analogue of this is fixing the car, oddly enough. Not the body. CARS are an extension of men's bodies. Now in all truth. A car can be fixed with a once a year tune-up. Unless you plan a career in motor work, tinkering with cars, motorcycles, bikes, their parts and accessories can be a big time waster. ANOTHER BODY obsession is sports. A passion about sports and winning at sports is not going to spell success in life. Did Ross Perot play any kind of ball? NO, so there you are! School gives us one class a day in PHYS. ED. That's all anybody needs to stay fit. It's enough of a dose of sports to make a rounded life. AFTER SCHOOL SPORTS do not make the Donald Trumps of Tomorrow. This obsession about being on the team, being the admired player is as neurotic as girls curling their eyelashes or lipsticking their mouths every few hours. It is a sure sign of and even leads to career failure later in life. SUBTRACT TEN POINTS for EACH HOUR SONNY BOY does either car/vehicle or sports, in his average day.

3.) EAT TO LIVE, DON'T LIVE TO EAT. If your children eat out at restaurants/ cafes or fast food more than twice a week, they are not using their own skills and their own kitchen or probably their own CASH and they're sure not using it correctly and that SET of habits will help them to be INDIGENT and under nourished one day when you're not paying the bills. A slice of a dead cooked greasy body on white bread is not nutrition or haven't you heard? Kid, stay in your own kitchen, at home, take raw carrots, some GREENS, some tuna, some protein, some vegies, fix it fast and eat it while you do home work and while you listen to the news. That's a good meal for all the orifices we've got. The empty brain is filled, the belly is filled. MANAGING our holes is how we get to the top. A man who manages them well is HOLY. The kid who learns that lesson early in life will surely go places. The kid that's wasting Dad's hard-earned money at fast food joints is a careless idiot. SUBTRACT TEN POINTS for FAST FOOD HABIT. ADD TEN POINTS when that kid learns to eat at home while he studies.

4.) HOW ARE THEY HANGING? IF Junior spends more than one hour a day with his male friends, let's call a spade a spade……Junior is 'hanging out.' HANG is not a pleasant verb. It's what we do to criminals. As GEORGE GILDER has said in many of his books, the young miscreant male gets worse by hanging with others of his kind. Men are basically sociopaths and put a bunch of them together you got trouble in River City. SUBTRACT FIVE POINTS FOR DAILY HANGING. BUT, hear this, you may SCORE FIVE PLUS POINTS if he hangs with ADULTS, doing special endeavors or projects (other than billiards, cars, reading sex magazines.)

5.) Magazines and Video Games - Big time wasters and very expensive, too. If you're zoning on VOGUE magazine or TEEN or playing BOZO BOARD GAMES or VIDEO GAMES, you are showing us that you like to be a vegetable. More than a half hour a day, we subtract FIVE POINTS. Better you should eat vegetables than be one.

6.) YAMMER YAMMER vs. the BLAH BLAH PATROL - If that kid's on the telephone yammering, and it's not a three minute call, he's a talkaholic. SUBTRACT FIVE POINTS for every hour a day he does it.

 FUTURE WINNER ACTIVITIES - NOW WE GET TO THE REAL SCORE INCREASING AREAS, the mark of a HERO, a future tycoon. Before we were involved with POINT-subtracting HIGH PLUS SCORING ACTIVITIES. When we have a kid --- say, --- who does real fast GROOMING, NO EATING junkfood in the STREET, NO sociopath HANGING OUT, NO TV watching. Well this kid has time to use to STUDY, to attract scholarships, to DO HOMEWORK or special school projects, to join special interest groups either at school or at the local ceramic shop. He may have an after school job to earn money for college. (better be under the table work as colleges won't give you student grants if you show income!) He may pursue hobbies and learning goals. HOBBIES often lead children into special fascinations, where they do special studies on their own, unbidden by authority figures. Those kids are tomorrow's intellectual giants, action prone individuals. Winners. So now we get to THE PLUSES.

1.) Do your children DO EXTRA CURRICULAR SCHOOL ACTIVITIES? These are the time users that look good on a resume and get us into the really hot colleges. These special interest clubs often involve socializing or 'hanging out' and they involve creativity, art pursuits and even --amusement. Hey that's not an evil word. AMUSEMENT is good. These POWER activities can frequently be combined with festive 'meals out' and socializing. So fun comes to them who PURSUE E.C.S.A. The ability to combine EXTA CURRICULAR activities with PLEASURE and socializing is a major plus. SCORE FIVE POINTS FOR EACH TYPE OF EXTRA CURRICULAR ACTIVITY OR HOBBY Junior has. Double the score if it's become a major fascination, like Bill Gates and those typewriters.

2.) BODY-RELATED HOBBIES - If she's sewing and he's building a vehicle,  give them a PLUS TWO POINTS. THEY ARE STILL ON BODY RELATED HOBBIES. She's still hung up on beauty, grooming and wardrobe and being admired and he's still on the size and brilliance of his car. These are body extensions. BUT they are starters toward doing more meaningful hobbies. Score TWO POINTS PER HOUR A DAY that THEY ARE DONE.

2.A) HOBBIES- IF there are hobbies that involve doing something creative, artistic, socially helpful, like painting, art, computers or helping adults, SCORE FIVE POINTS for each hour a DAY that this hobby is done. PC PARENTS: If the kid is chatting on the PC or ICQ, subtract five points for each hour a day this hobby is pursued. If one chats in a foreign language, I'll relent and let you add two points. But do you think your kid's gonna tell you the truth about PC chats? Watch what the kid does from a nearby chair for an hour. Then score accordingly.

3.) INTERESTING AFTER SCHOOL JOB?- Add five points if it's a fabulous job where the kid learns something. Interns at a law office, or works in daycare with children. Add 2 points if it's a schlub job done for money that's on the BOOKS. Take into account that COLLEGE GRANTs aren't granted to kids who show income. You gotta have a clean slate. NO MONEY on the record. SCORE FIVE POINTS if the kid has figured that out and works UNDER THE TABLE, detailing cars, landscaping, baby sitting, massaging old people at the old age home, cooking pies for a local café.

4.) THE PARENT THE KID HAS -Score Plus five (+5) for every positive affirming habit that the child's PARENT has IN RELATION TO THE KID. We';re only talking about 'in relation to the kid'. Like carrying her to Dancing school on Saturdays. Like taking him to Hebrew School. Does the parent PRONOUNCE the kid to be great? Does he /she AFFIRM the kid's heroism? Does he/she praise the child's stick-to-it-iveness and notice when this occurs? Does he look for clues that there are brains and re-affirm 'you're a smart one'? Does he have a hawk eye for the child's confronting life's realities? Parents can get lazy and stop seeing good stuff. Many parents only tend to hear the yells and squawks and scream negatively and not even notice the smooth times, hence they forget to re-inforce the positives, which slow down to a stop.

Every time that parent sees a PLUS, it's good to comment positively. JUST seeing that the child is heroic, assertive, handles reality or is kind, hard working is NOT enough. The parent has to comment on it … go on record for having noticed. Gifts, rewards are nice sometimes, too. But every plus can't be followed immediately by a cash prize. They must be spontaneous, unexpected, hence not every time. You're not teaching a beagle to beg or leap through a hoop as a trick. You're just duplicating what LIFE is going to do later, give positive feedback for positive behavior, frequently.


70-80 is a low score. Teach the kid fast to fill out a Welfare Form. Basically the DPSS will want a letter from a reputable DOCTOR telling them why your child is not able to work. EVER! So you might get your child to a doctor now --- a PSYCHIATRIST--- and get him used to malingering officially. Maybe get him some SSI or ATD right now. (Aid to the totally disabled.) Of course if you can't pay his medical bills, junior had better start thinking how HE can find such a doctor, also how he can live on 300$ a month after you're out of the picture and he's living on this generous AID stipend which basically is half of an entry level, minimum wage job. Also, what's he gonna do 24 hrs a day for the rest of his life. Big hole there. Point that out to him. Then Suggest the ARMY.

80-90 This kid obviously doesn't have a lot of time wasters. Great. He's a Potential Bureaucrat. Post Office, DEA, Cop, Fireman, Intake worker, Member of Congress maybe.

100- THIS SCORE has to be analyzed carefully. It could mean the child is not doing any time wasting yet at the same time that he's not doing anything TRULY POSITIVE either. If that's the case, the kid is a FLATLINER and has to be told, "Hey sonny, you're coasting with the original equipment. You have l00 thousand miles free then it's downhill from there, chum. You have NOT made enough of an effort to develop your muscle and surpass the pack. Your learning curve is flat as the pavement of that alley behind the house. When your pistons blow, you will find yourself working at the post office. If you're LUCKY.

(AN IMPORTANT DISTINCTION - The l00 score could mean the child's time wasters are cancelled out by SOME growth activities. THIS is a very busy kid. He lives hard and fast. Eats out, watches t.v. plays on the PC (both stupid chat rooms and valuable web surfing), then zones it on PC games, shops, fixes cars, slicks and pomades the hair like the Fonz yet gives time to the Red Cross and has a job after school. Give him A for spunk. If he's not doing it on Dr. Pepper or Ritalin keep feeding him whatever you're feeding him, and start talking about what his little motor could do if it were POINTED in some really high altitude direction. Get this kid lessons, teachers, gurus. One day this child will support you!)

130 Pretty good score. You are making big efforts and there aren't many time wasters. You will probably get there. You can actually maybe attain what you dream of, destiny, life, career-wise.

160 Ted Turner, Ross Perot, move over!

Remember the words of the famed Spiritual teacher, KRISHNAMURTI who SAID: "what is of importance is the (sad) fact that you obey and allow your judgement to be perverted by authority. Your judgement, your mind, your affection, your life are being perverted by things which have no value, and herein lies sorrow." In other words, Kid, if you're reading this, you have allowed a legion of junk to take over your mind, To occupy it. You are no longer master in your own home. Cut them out. Junk friends and suppressive parents. BOTH.

And Mom, Pop? If you are reading this. YOU ARE an AUTHORITY figure, right? Well guess what. You pervert him and make him powerless if you step in, tell him what to do, cut off the t.v. and Playboy Mag subscription, etc. Right? Cuz you step into the terrain of being Hitler. Knowing that you can't make the changeover for him makes it hard to just step in and tell your children to lose the Tostitos, chronic TV, the blaring music, the frivolous hanging out and all the other compulsions they have -- and get focused. When you say "Kids, Get a life! they are more likely to go get a death just to thwart you. At least if they're strong kids, they will.

So here's what you do. Kindly, sweetly, prepare junior a tall tasty drink and put him front of this PC and have him read this test. Tell him he gets a fiver if he answers all the questions and scores himself. if he has half a brain, he'll get the impact of the "YOU ARE THE SUM TOTAL OF YOUR DISTRACTIONS" theory of life. THAT ALONE will make him become a self starter.

Next, very unobtrusively, while you're at it, lose the Premium Cable, lose the celebrity workship magazines, the weekly mall movies and shopping expeditions. Lose the video game palace. Use the time freed up for family library visits!  While they live, get grandparents to talk about the old days.

Installing book shelves in the child's room, visits to library USED BOOK STORES and thrift stores with used books will have a genuinely hypnotic effect increasing author-worship, affection for the printed word, expanding idea-horizons, so find an Olde Curiosity shoppe Book Store! Cheapest I found is a family owned bookstore, prices start at 29C. GOODWILL a paperback is 4$. OUT OF MY RANGE. Get the kid a paypal account only to be used at ONLINE USED BOOK STORES like ABE BOOKS. Scan ABE regularly to make sure the tot's not ordering Henry Miller porn. Rent great art films and  history-teaching, soul-wrenching films and encourage kids to invite pals over, watch them at home. Gandhi, Under Fire, Missing, Amadeus. Gone with the Wind. And watch with him as kids understand NOTHING unless it is underscored.

NOTE: For a webpage on how to tutor the INFANT, see TEACH A TYKE.


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