If this is supposed to be the boy next door,
why don't my neighbors look anything like Aaron?
Excellent attitude.
The director's pet.
The pampered thoroughbred of the VistaMen stable.
Diva with a dick.
Bilingual–Spanish/English (and like a fool I took French).
Looks great in white, wet or dry.
Dreadful actor, as if it mattered.
My personal favorite—
that's why he gets two pictures.
He performs a few unforgettable gymnastic maneuvers
near the middle of "Muscle Heatwave."
The unfettered action underneath his navy shorts
must be seen to be fully appreciated.
Heterosexual to the point of caricature.
Excellent tits.
More articulate than necessary
for someone so pretty, built, and hung.
Intelligent–ambitious–successful.
More charismatic than any one bodybuilder should be.
Great voice.
The best body of the VistaMen,
but conspicuously reluctant to expose his prick.
If the bulging veins branching away from his crotch
don't make your heart race, check your pulse.
You may already be dead.
His demeanor suggests that he could have been your older brother's best friend,
the former Marine who used his clumsy intoxicated fingers
and his rumbling, beer-stained voice
to "persuade" you into giving him head
every Thursday night in the back seat
of his red 1979 Trans Am.
As a reward for swallowing, he,
mildly repulsed but genuinely impressed,
would smile the smile he saved for you,
ruffle your hair, and compare your skills favorably
against those of his prudish, unimaginative wife.
Lobby/Permanent Collection/Temporary Exhibit
The Tim Kramer Memorial Auditorium/Sculpture Garden/Topiary Maze
Wellbutrin Cafe/Audio Guide
