A SMALL TOWN GIRL EVEN WITH IMAGE PROBLEMS CAN TAKE MANHATTAN!
I always have a listening ear for those lovely country girls who fear they couldn't make it, who show that fear by saying "I don't really think you have to marry a millionaire to be happy and have a fulfilling life with the right person." To them, I gently say, "You're l00% on the money. The guy has to be a billionaire for you to end starvation of babies, don't kid yourself. A Millionaire doesn't cut it. You'd never be happy with a mere millionaire."
They laugh and then we talk and I will finally convince them because that's what I do. They have already sent me their photo and I have already seen that they're gorgeous. I am amazed they've halted midway up the ladder of life. They're usually living in isolated places, always rural small towns when they could have a swack at Hollywood, but I never pronounce the H word. L.A. is a loser's game. It could sink the most gorgeous. We have girls mudwrestling in strip clubs that are as pretty as Michelle Pfeiffer! Did you know Angie Dickenson was a secretary at Warners once? NObody thought she was anything as she had very very large hips and butt. All those looks and she couldn't get any respect until a camera saw what she really looked like close up and the lens fell in love with the face, small waist, large hips, long legs and then JFK saw it and made her his #1 mistress.
Out of empathy for Angie's yrs of suffering before she made it as a star, but more empathy for all those mudwrestlers, I started the seminar 'Stay Away from Hollywood, beauties. MARRY MONEY." Here's the gist of the first class. DEVELOP your PRIDE IN SELF. Put a HIGH PRICE on it.
I say "Dear girl, with YOUR BEAUTY, you can do marry anyone you want on the planet. Bill Gates would leave Melinda for you though I know you wouldn't break up a sister's thing. But I'm telling you, with those looks, you can afford to be very picky. Small rural town is not where you find a fabulous husband. Get really in shape and go to Houston, New York or Denver or London, Paris or Switzerland.
While you're there in the small town, go vegan for a while, very low carb vegan ..cuz I don't mean grains and rice. And then when you've saved up the rent for an apartment on what you weren't eating, come to the big city put on a white suit and walk your resume thru only HUGE CORPORATIONS with big money. That way, you'll give every exec CEO a chance to meet you and give GOD a chance to create the serendipity where that CEO is just going thru the main reception while you are coming in with a gardenia on your lapel and a brief case.
These rural gals assure me they're SELF SUPPORTING CAREER GIRLS. "I am a very independent woman, I have always been able to support myself without financial help from my family. I work at Joe's hardware..." (yawn, is there a Girlscout badge for independence and the ability to know a hammer from a drill? I thought not.)
THEN they go on to share a secret sorrow-- "but I do find that some men take advantage of my kindness, thinking that it is a weakness which is definitely not true and end up taking from me, and expecting all the time to be theirs and theirs alone which I do not like at all."
I answer "Loser men have small egos buried under a phony aggressive one. They want to boss you around to know that they exist. They crave ownership and slavery. Can you serve them, give to them, spend all your time consumed with serving them? WINNER men are readier to try to win you with effort and give you a long leash later, once they've won you.
A winner, alpha male has an instinctive competitive need to get in a leg race to win you from competitors which they sense are out there. THEY also GIVE to the gal, offer bribes. THAT part is disgusting, when a poor man tries to buy a girl's affection but a rich man can afford to give very costly gifts. IF YOU ARE NOT SLEEPING WITH HIM, one has to let them down very gently. "It's not appropriate to give gifts to a girl, it comes off like....well, a Faustian* bargain, a bribe." Very sweetly said. "I CANNOT accept this, even if it weren't conditional, even if it were only a token of your feelings." (*Goethe wrote a story the Master and Margharita, the legend of Faust, where this man sells his soul to the devil to get the girl which became the parable and classic reference of all time.)
I SAY WOMEN MUST BE MORE OF A TAKER, but when not bonded yet to the fellow, be it on subliminal levels, TAKING his interest, reverence, maybe favors......job favors, but always distinguishing bribe level favors from simply mini favors. SO PUTTING YOU IN as new head of accounting dept. when you just came to his office, NOT COOL. WOMEN loathe competitors so much that if a man has even a HINT of another woman being in the picture, they generally CANNOT EVEN BOND with him. MEN ARE DIFFERENT. The scent of multiple competitors gts them going even 'better.' so hey, I can see dating a dozen to get the main man going.
So now we're having a real chat, and invariably the woman confesses, "maybe thats why I'm still single LOL! Men dont really approach me, I have been told by a guy before that I am a bit intimidating!
So then from what she says, I start guessing. "THINGS you might do that INTIMIDATE. Perky, smart, informed, talks up, gives opinions, OFTEN on things like politics, politicians, policy....can talk about things for more than 3 min without waiting for him to put a word in, argues about your take vs. his take, sends him home without inviting him in, doesn't always buy or believe his self generated fanfare, says as much, and maybe you are even capable of making a romantic overture, kiss/hug without waiting for him to initiate."
SHe answers "Yes to all of it. I've even dragged a guy into bed. Thought he'd be pleased."
OH YES very pleased, but did he propose later? No.
There you are. Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?" I think the tactic of holding out is so exciting to men. It keeps them hungry and keeps them guessing! You can really weed out the losers from the keepers because the losers will give up with the guessing game, get irritated too, and find a chick who will give them all the spoiling they want, straight away, I find this happens with the more better looking men! Oh well, what can you do?! NOTHING. The safest thing is always do nothing. Be very still.
THE STILLNESS POME
When you give a guy the Nobel Prize
Why should he court committee?
He's had your kiss, your heart,
your soul and quite a bit of titty.
The mystery's off the garden.
The path led to a wall!
You want a guy to marry you,
surrender nothing at ALL!
WORTHY men stick around if you don't sleep with them. Whim-driven wolves don't. For that very reason we must NOT date pretty boys. The reason why DISCO HUNKS are wrong is even beauties have no power over them. They can get away with murder. They easily become sex addicts --not men who know how to MAKE AN EFFORT. So if you like cuties, a lyric comes to mind: "Looking for love in all the wrong places" Girls without brains seek them hourly, very physical girls. So soon, what is that man seeking in discos bars? He is looking for the kind of girls that go there."
She sends me an email saying thank you and sends a jpg of this TOTALY BEAUTY, greatest face, perfect features, greatest smile! A beautiful, amazing girl, so I write back one more time: Get on a healthfood diet just to get it all l00% perfect. Get lean, no milk, flour in any form at first, later you can throw a half cup of real four-culture yogurt in......occas. but having the no sugar, carbs, milk/flour takes weight off fast. PLUMP weight. GET A WHITE SUIT, Tight waist, peplum, white pumps, suede except in summer, then you wear leather, but wear summer pumps not strappies in summer as strappies say "I'm sexually very available" Yep, they do! You weren't listening? Well, I was!
Then, create a gorgeous resume, a lot of them, and walk it thru every major corp, even areas that aren't your speciality, like stocks, banking, and see how many flies stick to the ....jam!
Then I inform them, "Hey I Put you on the list, you will be receiving this kinda missive fer life. MY life. NOT YOURS.
And I think about it a while. There are alternatives. Now, here's where we can change trains. If you intend children and not a career, an ordinary guy is fine. Life is hard wired to give enormous amts of personal satisfaction and even joy thru romance, babymaking, garden keeping, cooking for your man, snuggling by the fire, hosting parties together. That's a lot of joy. But don't worry, ot every girl needs to do an Oprah and spend 40 million on a single girls' school in Africa. (She way overpaid for that....did she have Beverly Hills caterers hired for the cafeteria? Give me a million I can build schools, plumbing, a swimming pool, stack shelves wi. books from abes books..... and then with the other 39 million, build another 39 African schools in every major city with a slum!)
Who is to say you are the internat'l charity CEO type ???? If you want to INTEND it, you know the secret. You winnow out ordinary men. You make that personal sacrifice, always keeping your eye on the prize. You changing the destinies of thousands of citizens of starving nations.
Hey, if you have three daughters and they do it 25 years from now, that's good enough. YOU DID IT. YOU GROOMED them to be JESUS. (Sacred Activism is the modality of a Saint, Christ or Avtar i.e. God on earth,) So ALL OF THIS is in your realm of possibilities, even if right now you are married to some sweet guy in Schenectedy or Abilene or Jersey. Just have beautiful daughters!
The dividing of the two paths is right now, as you choose... ordinary guy? Or can I do the things that create an extraordinarily rich guy? You know the riff, LUCK INLOVE is full of them. Raise cash for a daycare or charity visiting CEO's in their offices. I always pick daycare as it's easier to control. Who's to say that some big charity is going to let you an independent fund raiser, go out and shake the branches of the ritzy trees?
The writer/philosopher Goethe also once said " CHILDREN OR BOOKS" In German that works. Buken Or KINDER -- something like that.