MY PERSONAL CATHARSIS IN A CAN 
...WITH ART & STUFF

SKETCHES/DOODLES       ST. PAT'S DAY CHICAGO!

3/20/2005- Chicago, IL

DESCRIBE YOUR DAY WORKING BACKWARDS IN TIME. DESCRIBE SHAPES & COLORS WITHIN YOUR DAY.

This journal entry is brought to you by Anne’s Stream of Consciousness. A-SOC: Not as stinky; but just as holy.

1. Mmmmm. Breakfast. Pig in a blanket crepe with WOAH! A load of eggs. (a mountain of yellow) Vegetarian still? Yeah…but I am celebrating. I have a job now. *Butthead chuckle* Hehehehe. Workin’ for the man. I’m writin’! No worries…
2. *Crunch* *Crunch* Honeydew. My weekly fruit infusion. Ding! Ding! Ding! Order Up! Nicki brings it over. Mint. Orange, green globes and…red? Honeydew, cantaloupe, raspberries and grape-DOH! Brown. Raisons/grapes. Gotta talk to them about that. Awwww….baby grape. Size of a blueberry. Ding! Order up!
3. "OOOHHH!" North Carolina State makes game winning
shot with 4.3 seconds left in the game. The Cure plays in the background. Hey! I know that tune! Coffee sucked through
a black stirrer. I love it.
4. Enter Nicki. Punk Rock/Alt queen and bar maid diva. Oh.
A nose stud and eye brow ring this week. Glass. Coffee & accompanying coffee condiments in her right hand, yellow menu in her left. "Have I become that predictable?" She laughs. Pulls out her white order tablet & blue pen and places it on the cherry bar table. "You know whatcha want?" "Yes!"
I make my order. "No!" Change it. "No!" Change it again.
Okay okay okay. That really is it. 2 Sweet ‘n Low. I pour the cream in my coffee. I love watching the waves of beige curl into the black. Heheheh…keeeewwwl.
5. Settle myself in. The Sunday Times on the table…The Hell? What’s with the dude grinding against the retro chick &
staring at her boobs?! And what’s the red thing in the front?!
I don’t wanna know. Throw my backpack under the chair. Is that a comfy one? Check the pale chintz wear on the
cushions. Front seat threads and nasty cushion exposure
on the corners. Not my usual chair… I hope it’s comfy. Ugh. Nope. Pick up backpack again pull out sketch pad, pencil sharpener (new toy…must sharpen) & blue drafting pen.
6. Is my usual table open? Checking… Faux aged support beam…comfy yet tacky plaid barkalounger…window table! Damn! Black trenchcoat on seat back. Must move to long
table next to window. Where’s Nicki? Short girl. Short girl. SHORT GIRL! White towel on hip? Roger. Hip hugger jeans. Wish that trend would die. Must be gettin’ old. Check the kitchen. Woohoo! Saul and Brian! Saul and I make eye
contact and smile. I wave. "Hey Theres" are exchanged. Whatta sweetie.
7. Walk in the black canvas winter door. Then glass door.
Jack. Jack. Where’s Jack? Cute, hunky Jack mellowing out behind the bar? Blue striped shirt. No! Plaid. Over a long sleeve white shirt. Heh. Grunge God. Oh! It’s Jack! Put on
my best Nicholson impression. "Heey Jaaack." Jack: "Hey, hon. Howsit’ goin’?" Me: "Pertty good thanks." Insert signature smile…here. DUDE! What’s with people drinking at 11 am in the morning?!
8. Staring at a Fosters beer sign. Leaning against a bike rack that resembles a black glo-worm kid’s creeper toy. Talking
to Amanda in Monroe. At least she’s doing better. 6 months.
I miss my friends. Hanging up and wishing each other the best. Breakfast on Buena. Head towards the black canvas doors.
9. Walking out my front door. Can it be Norwescon already? Wonder what her costume presentation/sketch is? Boy the Sunday paper is heavy. A sharpei! Must, pet, the puppy! Leash. Owner. Pets DO look like their owners! 20 something stocky chap with glasses and backwards cap. I ask… "She’s snobbish." I stretch out my hand. She sniffs. I get one pet in. She moves on. "I told ya, she’s snobbish." We laugh. I walk on. I pull out my cell phone and call Amanda.
10. Door closed? Yep. Door closed. I’ll tell her Monday. Remember, grab the paper. It better be there. Brass wall of boxes. Plastic bag on top. What? A phone book! Look at oak mail holder. Plastic bag. Orange corner. Bingo! The Times.
Is it basketball? Yep. Head out to breakfast THEN buy cereal. Must curb my spending. Budget. Budget. Budget.
11. Flesh colored metal door opens. Oak paneling. Enter elevatoOh GOD! Is that….urine?! Stench. An overwhelming, nauseating…first. Must tell the manager. What corner is that coming from? Open. Open. Hurry up!
12. Heading out. Do I have everything? Backpack. Zip!
Wallet. Sketch pad. Zip! Writing utensils (orange charcoal & oooooo. Gray sharpener) cell phone. Glass wrought iron. Unplug cell phone. Kchchchchcht! Velcro holder. Blue Card. Chicago Plus. Cool. Kcht. Zip! Zip! Closet mirror. Huh. What
hat today? Black sneakers. Denim jeans. Maroon tunic sweater. Sharon…you had good taste. Check hats. Black Game Works cap? Nah. Too casual. Jughead hat? Too red…Oooooo Kinky barret! Denim! Haven’t seen that in a while. *Jean Luc-Piccard imitation* "Make it so Numba’
One." *Holy Grail Monty Python imitation* "Vary nice."
Grab backpack. Show me somethin’. Ah! Orange. Golden Retriever. Person? Yep. Black winter jacket. Cool. Navy blue sweatshirt for me. Head to closet. Glass wrought iron table. Green curly…keys! Pick up. Sweatshirt. Should get that
zipper fixed. Sheepskin green scarf? Nah.
13. Computer ritual. Check Email. Cherie! Blog. Costume. Norwescon! So soon? Amanda. Wonder what she’s doing for Norwescon? Should call her. Wonder if she has adopted yet? Hey! Anime fan artist forum reply! My own little fan base. Keegan…caffeine hyper penguin guy! Better finish up his sketch. Wonder if Nial will hire me for his job? If so, how am I going to fit it in my schedule? Heh. "Snake Eyes." Go Joe! Heavy is his character? 6’1" 195 lbs. Bulky. 911? What kinda gun is that? Google. Huh. Secret agent with 2 air pistols?!
Look again. Ooooh 1911s! Google. Funny. They don’t have a set of finger grips on the handle. 2 version snouts? Grooves. For extra spin and penetration?Hmmmm…what website is this? Oh great. Japanese. I can’t read a thing. Check root
URL. WOAH! Only the Japanese would have an extensive info/gun link on a children’s education website. Cutsey cartoon logo. X-Files. Check my blog with poetry. Heh. So funny. I should post that Mulder ode to the X-Files forum. Google. No official forum anymore. Hey! Australian forum
with recommendation. I’ll post there. Damn. Gotta register. Name? Heh…B.J. I love that episode. Funny quote. Cool.
Post it. I’m outta here!
14. Huh? Irish music? Dude, I slept through my alarm. One
whole albums worth of my alarm! Better hike up the volume and change out my old time radio shows for tomorrow. Everything is blurry. What time? One blob from the top. 11 AM?! Uh oh! I can’t do this tomorrow! 9 am. Pee test. Better put my eye balls in and check for comfy jeans.

::Insert tedious morning ritual here::
45 minutes later.
Turn on my computer.

Huh….do I have A.D.D. ?

Today's entry will cover the subject of choosing one's animal guide (*sigh*) and writing about our reaction in reference to our animal guide. Such contemplations will be followed by recitations of two poems penned by moi and complimentary coffee to all card carrying beatnicks.

*snap**snap**snap**snap**snap**snap*

I THOUGHT I WAS...BUT NOW I AM...

I thought I was a Teddy Bear; but according to this scale I
am a Fox. I always felt like my pal Ron and I were Teddy Bears; big, tall, strong and squishably soft when hugged.
But alas, at this point in my life, I am a Fox: hoarder of info and mistress of camouflage & secrecy. Dum Dum DUMMM! My friend Raven, spiritual medium and disciple to the Virgin
Mary in Ballard, has told me that my totem is a BAT and my guardian angel is named "Mike" (not Michael...
A COMPLETELY different angel).

Go Fig.

A CONCRETE POEM about the Desert FOX.

And for all those D.D. fans out there. And I think I know who you are...

AN ODE TO A FOX

Within the dusty caves,
Of a building named Hoover
Buried under
Files
Cell phone requests
Sunflower seed shells.
I saw
"The Truth Is Out There."
Fox
"Spooky"
Mulder.

Agent of the FBI,
Under the file of
X.
Sleeves rolled up,
Emerald eyes on edge.
Tongue even sharper.
Both say:
Trust No One.

A modern day Heathcliff
Rugged and clean
Investigating.
Eyes to the sky.
Take
Me
Now.

His mind
And media,
Is in the
XXX.
Who is this
David Duchovny?
So witty & funny
I’m going to kill Scully.

He’s there
Just for me,
Every Friday.
His warm glow
Just the screen.
I wait for
A sign.

Yeah...you didn't actually think that I would write about
a real fox now didja? Silly Rabbit.

I know I should have been doing this assignment for my Dramatic Words & Images class Feb 15th; but I was lazy....well more confused, but that is behind me now. At present I am going to use this Live Journal Blog to fill my assignments and take it from there. So if this stuff sounds
a bit stuffy or formal, I am sorry. I feel I need to start out
with that style before I really let loose with the opinions. It can get a bit outrageous sometimes; but bear with me. It'll
get good. ;)

Today's (er Feb 15th's) question is:

HOW DOES THE PHYSICAL COMPOSITION OF A SPACE AFFECT YOUR EMOTIONAL RESPONSE?

Well it all began when I was a child....Aw heck, who am I kidding. This open ended touchy feelly question can be addressed on many levels. I choose to take it on the one
level that is the easiest and quickest for me to answer:
that of a spacey philosophical Graphic Designer.

Space and it's use of it conveys many different emotions throughout your life. In one's youth, space as seen on a
blank piece of paper is to be conserved. As an adult (in U.S. culture at least) space needs to be filled. The more, the better. Details, scale and accuracy are more important for children, as opposed to the whole picture. It is difficult for
an 8 year old to understand it is faster, easier and more effective to draw a fish's scales larger or even just
drawing an occasional squiggly indicator as opposed to every...single...tiny...scale. The perception is that one's
direct translation from "reality" to artistic/creative media
is "the right way" to do things. Only after a daunting 2 hours
of noodling does a child realize that such a detailed
endeavor is hard work. However, that doesn't mean that
they have realized the "larger picture;" that of a drawing project and the understanding of the most efficient plan to complete an assignment using alternative styles and techniques to achieve just as effective results within a compressed period of time.

The reason for detail, size, scale could also explain the
reason that paper within a drawing assignment is used so sparingly. Teacher's are always mystified by the fact that students, from kindergarten to college, have a tendency to only use space on a piece of paper so sparingly. When it comes to adults, I cannot tell you how many times I have heard people drawing small due to conservation of materials and consequently...money. It has been conditioned into younger children to never waste or it is better to leave something for later (unless, ironically, you are referring to eating habits. Go Fig.). So it has become better to draw
small and save the rest for later...just in case. The result is small landscapes and animals that only fill 1/16 of the 8 1/2" x 11" paper much to the amazement and confusion of adults. ("Man! How do they draw that TINY?!"). Suffice it to say,
small drives most adults NUTS! The funny thing is: no one
ever wonders: what might be tiny to adults, could be "scale" to a child's eye, size and perception.

Funny how society, culture, peers and overall exterior experiences change most peoples idea of size, space and
it's use as well as it's connection to importance. As you
grow, bigger becomes better. In American society in
particular size does matter (Don't get me started on the ol' Bob Dole E.D. commercials) and has a direct bearing on your success and failure in the eyes of your peers. What sells
a car? More head room, more storage capacity, bigger
media system. What makes it safer? The size. SUV, Truck, Van. What is rich and successful? A large house with huge tracks of land. However, let us not forget the technology connection with space. The more gadgets the better.
Small is still good and should be taken into account; but
the smaller technology is, the more you can stuff in your designated space.

George Carlin's take on stuff and space along with our culture's preoccupation with it is truer than we wish to
admit. Americans love space. When we get space, we feel compelled to fill it with stuff. Mostly little stuff; but stuff
all the same. Our houses are merely storage spaces for our stuff. When we fill our houses up with stuff, we need to
buy a new house to make room for our stuff. With more
room available, we feel compelled to fill it up...with what? MORE STUFF! However, when we see other people's houses filled with THEIR stuff, we are shocked about how much S#!T people can collect! It's always OTHER people's stuff is S#!T and your S#!T is stuff. The routine and circular reasoning continues on from there.
Who told us that we need all this stuff anyway? And the person and/or people that planted the thought into our
heads that stuff, space and stuff tightly stuffed in spaces equals happiness should be dragged out into the street and shot...only to be prepped, embalmed and buried in and with his/her's own stuff.

My point is this...Be comfortable with what you do and don't have. Minimalist attitude and multifunctional stuff doesn't mean you are a popper on the brink of homelessness; and a studio apartment doesn't make you a starving artist. To
prove your social status by the stuff you have, how many monthly loan payments you must pay and cards you've maxed out just makes you one thing:

Full of S#!T.

11/24/2004- Chicago, IL

Today's entry title: SNOW IS NOT SUPPOSED TO INJURE YOU.

Yes here I am. FINALLY! I have had a bugger of a time
getting back to this blog thing. Between school, colds, homework and class observations I have been at a loss for time. But it is the Thanksgiving weekend and I have quite
a set of small stories to tell. My digital camera broke on me and I am saving my money to get a new one. So, no new
pics for a while. Boy, do I wish I had that camera today.
Why? Well, check the title and listen to this un!

The other day I watched the news to find out that today is SNOW DAY! Yep, the first day of snow for the season. The weather is a bit unpredictable here, you know, like the convergent zone between Everett and Seattle. Only turbocharged. In the span of 5 minutes waiting at a bus
stop it snowed, rained, hailed and had wind gusts strong enough to buckle my knees if I wasn't careful. By a small miracle I finished my errands today. By the time I came
home I found that I had a nick or two on my face. Trust me,
I didn't have that when I left this morning. Snow and rain is coming down...kinda. I mean, it is coming down 140° angle. The hilarious part is: I am one of lucky ones! There are
power outages (In Chi Town! Can you believe it?!) 4" on the West Side and 9" South in Indiana. For those who don't know the reference to Indiana, the border of Indiana is "normally"
a 45 minute - 1 hour drive. According to the news, it's
taking 2 hours or so to hit the border. CBS Evening News
has highlighted the weather. Now that's neato. More snow
is supposed to come Saturday as well. Surreal. I really can't help but laugh. Viva Thanksgiving!

As you read this blog you might be realizing that, yes, I am still in Chicago for Turkey Day. No family, just Yours Truly.
No worries, tho! I have a reservation at the local Vegetarian Restaurant for "Tofurkey Dinner." I know. Some are saying "EEEEEWW! TOFURKEY!" Remember, I am a vegetarian now. This'll be my first year trying it. I am keeping an open mind.
Of course, it's not going to be ANYTHING like Mom's home cooking, but it'll do. I can't believe that this town doesn't
shut down for holidays. This is what a real city is like!
Woohoo! Downtown businesses and streets are already decked out for Christmas. It is beautiful! Of course, I am
SO not going out the day after Turkey Day to see the sales.
I don't have a death wish. Imagine 1 million or so people compressed into 10 blocks at once. HELL NO!

On the other fronts, I have found out so much about this
city. Unfortunately, I have not had a chance to play tourist. When my friend PAUL comes from Manchester, England, I
will do that with him. I have been learning the way to
function in this town. This place is so greedy and corrupt it's comical. For those people out there that complain about the Federal Government in it's present administration being so bad...you make me LAUGH! HA! HA! See? I laugh. The only way a person can get through the day is that you know
certain schemes to avoid and the rest of them, you just swallow your pride and take it in the buttocks. Why? 'Cause there is nothing you can do about it. Example: There is at
least 1 corruption scandal at Chicago City Hall at all times. Presently, there are 3 or 4. Reaction? So what else is new? Plus side of this town, Unions are BIG TIME! I love it. The way it is supposed to be. Down side? Corrupt. Answer? So what else is new? Taxes and prices for, well, ANYTHING!
Everything is taxed. Groceries for example. Deli sandwich meat is sold here by the HALF pound, at the same price of
a full pound in Washington. I have to pay taxes on food.
Here is the tax pyramid for me: Chicago City Tax, Cook
County Tax, Illinois State Tax, Illinois INCOME Tax AND
Federal tax. What do you say to that? So what else is new?
I sense a pattern. Hmmm...

If I haven't mentioned it before, I am in a fairly good and safe neighborhood (knock on wood). However, there is a series of homosexual murders going on in the area (HALSTED ST=Seattle's Broadway)." 3 murders so far. 1 person has
been arrested for 1 murder. The others are open still. It
would be interesting, though scary if it is another serial killer trolling for victims. For those who might not know, Jeffrey Dauhmer (Cannibal Killer from Milwaukee, WS) would pick up his gay victims a few blocks South of where I presently live.

Aggressive homeless people are also everywhere. You push back, there is no problem. Watch out though for them or others trying to pick your pocket. I have had 2 or so incidents where someone has opened my backpack (WHILE IT IS ON
MY BACK!) approximately 4" to try and take something, only to find I HAVE NOTHING! I get off the bus to find that my backpack zipper is a bit open. Everything in place. I mock
the pick pockets and pushy homeless people. HAHAHAH! Since this is the season, I am opening up the old suitcase locks for use. That'll learn 'em.

On the upside, Chicago is an amazing town to be apart of.
I have finally gotten down into a routine and am still
exploring things. This place is packed to the gills with restaurants. There is a restaurant on the outskirts of town called MEDIEVAL TIMES. It's a castle, NO KIDDING! You might have heard of it. It's a dinner and jousting tournament. No forks allowed. There are also Fancy Pants restaurants as
well. Beautiful and High Class. If you aren't interested in eating there is also theatre. My bus that takes me to school heads right down into the heart of town. In the span of 20 blocks I have seen "The Christmas Carol" with Richard Chamberlain, Def Poetry Jam, Diana Ross, Blue Man Group, Jazz Fushion Festival etc. This doesn't cover the small indie theatres in the area. I have found more places just within
an 4 block circumference (5 and counting) of where I live.
Not to mention the numerous improv theatres and groups
(4 in 6 blocks on 1 street). I haven't even mentioned the
COOL film community this place has. There is literally EVERYTHING available to see. I have personally totally in to the Historical Silent Film Society and Historical Movie Palace Restoration Projects going on in town. When it comes to entertainment critics in this town, I cannot stop laughing at their scathing reviews. OH MY GOD! THEY ARE GREAT! In
fact, I have collected a couple reviews already and hope to frame them soon. If you like buildings the architecture in this place is breadth-taking. There is nothing new about a
century old building here. To me, it's romantic. Hand carved masonry is EVERYWHERE. In fact, there is a historical stained glass museum dedicated strictly to architectural stained
glass windows from the past 120 or so years. Don't get me started on the museums. I can tell it will take me a summer
or so just to see them all. I can go on, but all I would be
saying would be: "Beautiful Country!"

I better wrap this up for now. I will be writing on the morrow about the trials and tribulations of the Chicago School
System. For those out there in Washington State who complain about class sizes and various struggles with the system...Yeah, WHATEVER. You'll presently get no
sympathy from me. More about that, later.

In the meantime, HAVE A GREAT TURKEY DAY!

10/15/2004- Chicago, IL

10/13/2004- Chicago, IL

On 9/08/2004 I did what my friends have called as "brave, insane, weird and stupid."

I moved to Chicago, IL.

I am originally from Seattle, Washington (give or take a
town) and to once again establish myself as a self
sufficient chick, as well as help out my parents financially,
I relocated to Chi Town to become over-educated (I am getting my Master's in Art Education at Columbia College)
and find a job in the Graphic Design field.

I have gone through some stereotypical bumps in the road (well, more like sink holes) when it comes to moving and school but I have learned some interesting things so far:

• Be Nice to People: If you are nice and sincere people
  will not only treat you well; but you also will get faster service, more perks, first time discounts and a
  possible connection when you need help. My personal favorite is that you also make a friend on the way.
  Trust me, when you are in a town where you don't
  know a soul, every good person counts!

Sound too optimistic? Honey, you are looking at a pessimist here. I am a walking example of Murphy's Law. I am in fact talking from experience. So far I have gotten discount haircuts, coffee, food, tickets and furniture. If you are
sincere and nice to people; 99% of the time you have made someone's day and they will be happy to give you a hand.
Just remember, tell them to PAY IT FORWARD!

• Don't take Any Guff: Of the 1% who are just being an ass, choose your battles. Cranky people on the street are a waste of your time for the most part; but the people who are yanking you around when it comes to money, GIVE 'EM HELL!

My best friend (rest her soul) Sharon taught me the art of Standing Up For Yourself. If someone has got your money
and won't give you the product or service that is comming
to you, call them up every day. Trust me, if you are like me, you hate getting in people's face; but if you don't; they'll
just walk all over you. Second, never hesitate to go up the Chain of Command. For example, I was treated horribly by Pratt Institute when I was applying for school. After Pratt
lost my file 4+ times, I told them to take me off their list. When they didn't I wrote a professional and nasty letter to
the Vice-President of Pratt and sent copies to the Head Of Enrollment, Head of Art Education as well as the Admissions Counselor. I got an apology and my admission fee back. A rarity when it comes to colleges.

Well enough of my pontifications in reference to life lessons. Lets get to the cool stuff. PICTURES!