These are my answers to some of the most common questions I get asked online. If yours isn't in here, and you think it should be, please tell me. Thank you.

"Are you M or F?"
Yes, I am a male or a female.
Before I answer this one, I'd like to point out exactly how personal this question is. Essentially, you are asking me what genitals I posess: Do you have a penis or not?
Also, birth sex does not necessarily signify gender in any way. Whether I was born with a penis or not is not something that you will be able to tell online. In fact, you wouldn't even be able to tell the answer to this question if you were to meet me in person. Some people born without a penis acquire one later, and some people born with them have it removed later. Some people born with a penis express their gender as women without altering their anatomy, and some people born with a vagina express their gender as men without having their anatomy altered, either. While you may think you'd know the difference, in reality, you probably don't. Not without checking, anyway.
Now, to answer your question, I was born a male (i.e. with a penis), and I identify as a man; I like playing at being a butch man, in fact.

"Are you gay?"
Sometimes I'm happy, sometimes I'm not, probably like most of you, dear readers.
This question never ceases to amaze me, but I get it all the time. Like the name doesn't give it away.
I am a man who is erotically, emotionally, and sexually attracted to other men. Gay is fine to describe this, although I prefer the term queer.

"Why do you use the term 'queer'? Isn't it offensive?"
I use the term queer for a variety of reasons.
First, I use it in the spirit of reclaiming a word that has been traditionally used to hurt gay men, drag queens, lesbians, and other folks who do not fit gender or sexual norms. Using the term positively steals much of the negative power it holds. If someone throws it at me as an epithet nowadays, I am able to say, "Yeah, and your point is...?"
Second, I use it because we queers are different. While I tend not to agree with a whole lot of psychoanalysis, I do agree with Freud, Lacan, and other psychoanalystic theorists that sexuality is fundamental to the human psyche. We queers are different on such a fundamental level, and society is all too quick to remind us of our transgressions.
Third, I use it because it has a certain shock value. It disjoins people, and makes them think about things a little.
And, lastly, it's an expression of my solidarity with lesbians, gay men, bisexual men and women, and transgender persons; it's also an expression of my solidarity with all others who transgress gender and/or sexuality norms: sadomasochists, leathermen, straight-acting gay men, prostitutes, drag queens, drag kings, leatherdykes, etc.

"Do you think it's a choice?"
Yeah, right. I was sitting down, thumbing through a catalog of sexualities, when I stumbled across "Queerboy -- Benefits: None Hindrances: Society hates you."
No one would choose to go through the things queers have to go through: being denied housing (and I have been) because my partner is of the wrong gender, being denied marriage because my partner is the wrong gender, getting threatened/beaten/killed because someone believes you to be queer. No one would choose to be disowned by their family, or spat at, or called names, or told he was going to die of AIDS.
If this still hasn't answered your question, then pose one to yourself: when did you choose whatever sexuality you now consider yourself? How do you know you are heterosexual (or whatever)? And why did you choose it? Most likely, your answer and mine would be the same: I don't choose who I am erotically, emotionally, and sexually attracted to.
I did choose, however, to come out of the closet about it. That, in my opinion, is the only choice in the issue.

"But why do you have to be so blatant?"
Heterosexuality is blatant. If you are heterosexual, you probably haven't noticed it, though.
TV shows (Beverly Hills 90210, for example), novels of any type (especially romance), movies (Titanic), popular songs.
Heterosexuals display their sexuality all the time: hugging, holding hands, kissing, talking about how their husband/wife/boyfriend/girlfriend is doing, talking about plans for their wedding or honeymoon.
However, if I talk about my partner, or hold his hand, or kiss him, suddenly, I'm "blatant." Yes, I am, actually, to those who didn't notice that queerness is all around them. I don't make much of an effort to hide it.
Why not? Because it takes a lot of effort to hide your partner or your erotic attractions. If you don't believe me, try this for a week: don't say one word to anyone about your spouse/partner. Not one. Then evaluate how it feels.
Another reason I am out of the closet about my sexuality is to serve as a role model for younger queers. There aren't many proud queers out there, and the suicide rate among gay and lesbian young people is astronomically high: two to three times higher than heterosexual young people. If I can provide the strength to one queer teen to survive another round of homophobia, it's worth taking the flack.

"What's anal sex like?"
Usually this question isn't phrased quite that politely. You get the gist of the question, though.
I don't ask you about exactly what you do in bed. Unless you are interested in sharing my bed with me, I won't tell you what exactly I do in mine. If you want to find out what (whatever sex act) is like, I advise trying it and finding out for yourself. I couldn't describe it to you, anyway. You'd feel differently about it--we're all different.
And, no, it's not a contradiction that I'm out of the closet, but I won't discuss particulars about my sex life. Society makes my queerness their business--denying housing because of who my partner is, potentially firing me if I mention my partner's name at work, and so forth.

"How come you only talk about your sexuality?"
This question, too, comes in a variety of guises. If you think yours applies here, please do.
First, let me say I'm a graduate student in English, and my three areas of emphasis are Lesbian & Gay Studies, Colonialism & Postcoloniality, and Victorian Studies. If you are a graduate student, or ever were one, you probably realize how much your areas of emphasis take over your life, no matter what field its in. I know people who get nearly orgasmic over the works of Willa Cather, for example, because that's who they're studying. Every graduate student is just slightly obsessed with their field of study.
Second, I usually don't bring it up. Usually, someone asks me a question about it, and then others jump in, and suddenly, someone's accusing me of starting the discussion.

If this doesn't answer your questions, please feel free to ask any others. And if you think yours should be in here, let me know.