Red Cross Nurse (Sonja Neudorfer) How long were
you married?
Maria Braun (Hanna Schygulla) I still am
married.
Red Cross Nurse I mean, it didn't last
long, did it?
Maria Braun Yes, it did: half a day and a whole night.
Mother (Gisela Uhlen) It's wrong to give all your love to only one person, Grandpa. If you don't have potatoes, you eat turnips. When the turnips are gone, you eat gruel. But every girl loves her one and only. He goes to war; five months later he's dead, and you mourn the rest of your life. Does that make sense to you, Grandpa? It drowns you.
Maria Braun commenting on her new hairdo I look
like a poodle.
Betti Klenze (Elisabeth Trissenaar) You think so? It's the latest
thing.
Maria Braun I'll bet the Americans are crazy about poodles.
Peddler (Rainer Werner Fassbinder) I
just happen to have a beautiful edition of Kleist's works on hand.
Maria Braun Books burn too fast. They don't give
any heat.
Peddler That's one way of looking at it.
Maria Braun It's my way.
Peddler Right now it's probably the right way.
Maria Braun I'm working in a bar--selling beer,
not myself.
Doctor (Claus Holm) Even if I've learned to stop believing people here, I still believe you. I know you can take care of yourself. And there's always penicillin.
Vevi (Isolde Barth) You're here alone, and your
husband's who knows where, maybe even dead. And love's only a feeling; it's
not real.
Maria Braun But it's a good feeling, and it's
real, and it's true.
Vevi True? The only thing true is an empty stomach. And feelings are something you have between your legs, like an itch. You can't do it on an empty stomach and with someone who isn't here. Your sweetheart over there, he's here, and he ain't starving, and he's got a feeling for you.
Maria Braun visits the first-class section of a train.
Maria Braun Ever notice how tiny the rest rooms are? I thought they'd be bigger in first class--fatter people.
Maria Braun An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure.
Karl Oswald (Ivan Desny) Senkenberg's basically
a good fellow, and so am I.
Maria Braun I'm not.
Karl Oswald We're businessmen, not bookkeepers.
Senkenberg (Hark Bohm) I beg your pardon. I am a
bookkeeper.
Karl Oswald Sorry.
Maria Braun I don't know a thing about business, but I do know what German women want. You might even say I'm an expert on it.
Karl Oswald You've no sense of humor. The best
accountant in the world and not a nickel's worth of imagination, not a
wooden nickel.
Maria Braun That's a compliment. Imagination would only be a liability to you. Someone must ensure we don't lose our credit rating.
Karl Oswald I suppose we'll just have to wait
for a miracle.
Maria Braun I prefer making miracles than waiting for them.
Karl Oswald You were different last night.
Maria Braun Last night I slept with you. Today
I'm working for you.
Karl Oswald Afraid someone will think we're
having an affair?
Maria Braun I don't care what people think. I do care what you think. And you're not having an affair with me. I'm having an affair with you.
Karl Oswald I feel like a schoolboy.
Maria Braun Because you are. A dear, dumb little
schoolboy.
Karl Oswald Why didn't you want to go?
Maria Braun You would've proposed to me.
Karl Oswald Right. Is that why--How did you
know?
Maria Braun I know all about schoolboys.
Senkenberg Your union is talking socialism,
Klenze, and I don't like it.
Willi Klenze (Gottfried John) We're only paying
you back in kind. It's no wonder, the way you play the entrepreneur.
Senkenberg The secretary of the treasury said--
Willi Klenze Yeah: "We're all in the same boat." Trouble is, it's your boat, and we have to row it.
Maria Braun I'm a master of deceit: a capitalist tool by day, and by night an agent of the proletarian masses--the Mata Hari of the Economic Miracle.
Karl Oswald begins kissing Maria Braun.
Maria Braun I thought we were having dinner
first.
Karl Oswald A good businessman knows how to adapt to circumstances.
A group photo is about to be taken.
Betti Klenze Should we wake Grandpa?
Mother No, everyone should look natural. He's always asleep.
Mother He kept me warm on those cold
nights after the war.
Hans Wetzel (Günter Lamprecht) Oh, really?
Mother He always brought me firewood.
Maria Braun Most happy people look indecent when one is unhappy.
Mrs. Ehmke (Lilo Pempeit) He wants to talk to
you.
Maria Braun I said I wasn't here.
Mrs. Ehmke speaking into phone I'm sorry, she's
out of the office.
Maria Braun I don't want to go to lunch.
Mrs. Ehmke speaking into phone She doesn't want
to go to lunch--oh, I'm sorry--Hello? Mr. Oswald?
Mrs. Ehmke hangs up the phone and starts to cry. Maria Braun starts to
laugh.
Maria Braun What a riot! That's the funniest thing I've seen in a long time. Stop crying now. Call him back and tell him I'm possessed by the devil. He can meet the devil for lunch at 1:00 if he wants.
Karl Oswald You're cynical.
Maria Braun Maybe I am.
Karl Oswald You're bored with me.
Maria Braun Maybe I am bored with you.
Karl Oswald Why don't we just leave?
Maria Braun Because you're well brought up and I pretend I am.
Karl Oswald Do you want to leave me?
Maria Braun That would be stupid. It would only make us unhappier. At least if you know you're unhappy, there's still hope.
Maria Braun Betti was your wife, after all--the
only person I can tell all my troubles to.
Willi Klenze Because she doesn't listen.
Maria Braun Could be. You need somebody who listens. I need the opposite.
Maria Braun And Annelise--what's she like?
Willi Klenze She's what a man needs, someone who
is his equal. She can talk, think--my equal in every way.
Maria Braun So you think women have to be men's
equal?
Willi Klenze Sure, except most men aren't
conscious of it yet. "Consciousness lags behind reality."
Maria Braun Did Annelise say that?
Willi Klenze Why?
Maria Braun You'll wish you had your Betti back.