------------------------------------------------------------------------ The Squirrel 's Court Newsgroups: alt.devilbunnies From: adm4@po.cwru.edu (Aaron Mandelbaum) Message-ID: Date: Wed, 14 Sep 1994 06:22:34 GMT Organization: CWRU The main auditorium was packed. It was crazy to look out across the sea of fur that surrounded them in all directions... it just seemed... silly. This was NOT a good attitude to have before a trial. Especially when you were guilty as sin. Aaron looked down at Sylvie, sitting nearby, but she was frozen, staring at the wall, or possibly the crowd. After a suitable interval, Loren came onto the stage. He was grinning widely. "So," he said to the two prisoners, "Are you ready to present your case?" "We demand a jury trial," Aaron said, staring right back at Loren, but looking away after only a fraction of a second. Loren froze, a puzzled look on his face. "What?" "What?" Sylvie echoed. The crowd murmured. "We are entitled to one, you know," Aaron said, "I looked." Loren sighed. "Fine, fine," he said, "You you you you and you, come up here!" "No," Aaron said, "That's not how you do it. It's supposed to be random." The five coming up froze. "I selected them at random," Loren said. "Which is why four of them are silver?" Loren looked, and sure enough, it was true. Four out of five of all the front rows were silver, since the higher ranked squirrels got the front seats. The sheepishly sat back down. "Fine," he said, "ACORN! Have the computer pick six names at random. NOW!" A few minutes later, a list of names was read, and the indicated squirrels worked their way through the crowd for jury duty. There weren't any chairs, so they just kind of stood there, looking up at Aaron nervously. He tried to smile innocently, and one of them almost broke and ran. "Now," Loren said, "Answer the charges!" "What charges?" "That you murdered five of the officers sent with you on the raid! We have video of you slicing two in half, then rolling over and crushing the others! Do you deny it?" "This is a trial?" Aaron asked. "In my warren, it is," Loren said, "Well?" "I killed them," Aaron said, "But it wasn't murder." "What was it, self defense? They weren't attacking you, we have that on tape as well." "I executed them," Aaron said, with a dramatic pause, "For disobeying orders." Loren looked puzzled yet again. "Correct me if I'm wrong," he said, turning to the crowd, "But don't you have to actually be in command of someone before you can murder them for disobeying orders?" "It wasn't murder," Aaron said, "You put me in charge of that mission, and I had the right to do whatever I felt necessary to maintain discipline." "You were NOT in command," Loren said, looking at him darkly. "You said I was." "I was testing you, to see if you were trustworthy. And you failed." "But I WAS in command." "No, you were not. I told the officers, the ones you murdered, to keep you under control if you tried to betray me. You had no right to order them to do anything!" "You gave me the right when you gave me the orders, the WRITTEN orders, that put me in charge. They're on file in the official records, your secret, illegal orders are not." "I have the right to give any orders I want!" "But you can't hold us responsible for orders you don't tell us!" "And why not?" "Because it's against the law!" "I *make* the laws, and I can change them." "Then do it," Aaron said, "But that doesn't change that what I did was legal when I did it." Loren was silent, so he continued. "Besides, how long do you think the warren would stand for it if you started arbitrarily changing the laws?" "They need me," he said, "I'm the only one with the vision to lead us through this crisis." "But I AM innocent." "Not innovent," Loren said, "You killed them." "But not guilty of murder." "Let the jury decide," Loren spat, glaring at them threateningly. One of the jurors glanced at the armed guards lining the chamber. They put their heads together and whispered furiously for a few minutes. "Not guilty," one of them said at last. Loren glowered. "Very well," he said, "But now on to the other section of the case..." "Not guilty," another one said, "She was just trying to protect him from your execution squad, and they attacked her. She has the right to defend herself, you know." "Erik?" Sylvie asked, recognizing him at last. He looked at her and smiled. "What is the meaning of this!" Loren sqeaked. "Bad luck?" Aaron suggested, smirking. "This is a travesty!" "Can we go now?" Sylvie asked, getting out of her chair and walking across the stage. "Of course we can," Aaron said, "We're not accused of anything." They got halfway across the room before Loren thought to call the guards. Aaron hissed as several lasers found their target, but screams of pain from the crowd indicated where others had missed. Sylvie and Erik, and the rest of the 'randomly' selected jurors huddled in his arms as he lumbered across the room, and the rest of the squirrels scrambled to get out of the way. Aaron had to lunge to avoid stepping on a straggler, but he managed to leave the room without killing anyone. He could hear the riot erupt behind him. "How did you do it?" Sylvie asked Erik as Aaron ran down the hall. "I did it," Aaron said, "Chris gave me his password, and his account is unrestricted. I changed the random selection program to just print out six names I heard you mention. I was just afraid Loren would notice." "And those written orders?" "He did tell me I was in charge. I doubt if its recorded anywhere, he seems a bit more intelligent than Nixon." "Who?" Erik asked. "Never mind." "So where do we go?" one of the other squirrels asked. "Chris is mailing the rendezvous to everyone who voted against Loren. We'll meet outside of town and decide what to do next." "You mean we're leaving the warren?" Sylvie asked. "We have to," Aaron said, "Loren will never forgive us for humiliating him in public. We'll be lucky if he doesn't drop everything to hunt us down." "We'll be lucky to get out of here alive," she replied. -- Aaron Mandelbaum (Strike fast, strike hard, and then run like hell!) ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Usenet Web 1.0.3 (development) / webmaster@netimages.com