Paranoia
I'm not paranoid, you know. Everyone says I am, but that's because they know I'm smarter
than them, and fear me.
If you find yourself thinking such things, giggle. It helps break the mood before you
go insane. [giggle]
Not that I'd know. [embarrassedwiggle]
Other things to avoid if you suspect you might be paranoid:
- Staring at the stars, moon, or other heavenly bodies. Staring at the sun is
okay, except that you'll kill your eyes.
- Parties. The kind of people who go to parties are not the sort that will
restore your faith in humanity (here, I'm assuming you're human, which
is a reasonable assumption considering the proportion of humans to
devilbunnies and squirrels on the web). The same principle holds for
bars and clubs.
- Squirrels. Both of our -- [pause]
Er, nevermind. Squirrels are you friends. Trust us. }:)
- Jumping to conclusions. This includes 'cleverly detecting the hidden insult
in so-and-so's comments'.
- Obsessively hiding things like your real name or
appearance from the general public, which, trust me, couldn't care less.
More to come, next time I'm feeling cynical.