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Aliens: Foiled Again
MPS: Yuba City, CA, USA:Dwight (Ike) Splatchen is saving Yuba City again. According to Mr. Splatchen, in 1964 aliens from a mysterious planet located in the Messier 101 Galaxy attempted to invade Yuba City using television signals permeating throughtout the city.
Dwight (his friends call him Ike) said he was able to thwart that invasion by creating an extension to his television antenna and switching through the complete range of channels every 32 seconds thus preventing the aliens from forming a gateway to Yuba City.
"This new invasion", said Mr. Splatchen, "is being attempted through the cell phone network broadcast towers located on the Yuba City High School's athletic field. The aliens use the radio waves to infiltrate peoples minds and thereby take control of them. I have devised a method to defeat them. I have created an aluminum foil uniform which blocks penetration by the radio waves. The uniform also creates a feedback which weakens the initial broadcast and kills the aliens."
"I intend", continued Mr. Splatchen, "to provide every citizen of Yuba City with an aluminum foil uniform. The massive feedback will destroy the entire alien civilization and insure that they never attack us again. There is, of course, an expense involved in making over fifty thousand of these special uniforms. I will have to charge $49.99 for each of them."
Left: Cellphone tower located on Yuba City High School athletic field.
Right: Using an aluminum foil uniform of his design, Mr. Dwight (Ike) Splatchen shields himself from the controling radio waves.
Left Brain, Right Brain
Think about it.
