Neon Mailing List

Posting Form

 I am posting for the purpose of:

[ ] Rehashing a topic that was beaten to death two months ago

[ ] Bragging about the size of my package

[ ] Dispersing non-Neon content

[ ] Demonstrating a lack of knowledge of punctuation or grammar (also known as showing I am a super-deaf!!!!!!!, cold-chillin'!!!!!, super-slamming!!!!! bad-@ss m**** f*****!!!!!?????!!!!!!)

[ ] PROVING MY "CAPS LOCK" KEY IS STUCK, AND MY "!" KEY REPEATS!!!!!!!

[ ] Showing I can't read an FAQ

[ ] Inciting every single other list member to send a "me too" message

[ ] Selling overpriced used parts

[ ] Advertising stuff my Neon business is selling, despite the fact that it against list policy

[ ] Demonstrating that I don't know the difference between a G-Tech and a G-spot (or how to use either)

[ ] Demonstrating that I just got email capability, and boy is it cool! (or kewl or kewel or whatever)

[ ] Sending a joke that's been around forever

[ ] Complaining about someone else's waste of bandwidth or lack of Neon content while contributing nothing myself

The subject is:

[ ] Virus (hoax)

[ ] Virus (probably hoax)

[ ] Non-automotive joke

[ ] Favorite song to which to wank

[ ] Those kooky, nutty Brady Bunch kids!

[ ] Incorrectly identified on the subject line

[ ] Not related to the body of the message

[ ] I refuse to use the [1] [2] [3] convention

[ ] How much is my car worth?

[ ] Those really swell Miller Lite commercials by Dick

[N/A] Neon related

[ ] What's a subject?

[ ] Covered in an FAQ

[ ] Re: Neon Digest #___

I am (check all that apply):

[ ] An athiest

[ ] A democrat

[ ] A libertarian

[ ] A republican

[ ] Not registered to vote

[ ] A sixth grade graduate

[ ] Contemplating learning how to spell

[ ] Paying too much for insurance for my car

[ ] Unconcerned that the US government spends more in an hour than I will make in my lifetime

[ ] Using this list as a forum for furthering my cause or beliefs

[ ] Other______________

The large Kanji character painted on my hood means:

[ ] Feel the power in my victory (from an actual ad in Sport Compact Car)

[ ] My genitals swell with pride at the machoness of my car

[ ] Bite the wax tadpole

(No offense to any of our Asian listeners out there. Check out the "Rice Boy" Web site. An Asian guy created it to make fun of the guys who do all of the "looks" mods to their cars but have no idea how to make a car perform.)

I spanked a:

[ ] Mustang [ ] Corvette [ ] Trans Am [ ] 300Z

[ ] Camaro [ ] Porsche [ ] '73 Pinto [ ] Viper

[ ] NSX [ ] Myself [ ] Other _____________

by: [ ] 1 car length [ ] 2 car lengths [ ] 3+ car lengths

My car is faster than:

[ ] Erich H.'s race prepped car [ ] A Ford Fiesta

[ ] the SSCThrust project [ ] Everyone else's

My car gets the following miles to the gallon:

[ ] 0 - 10

[ ] 11 - 20

[ ] 21 - 40

[ ] 41+

My car has the following miles on the clock:

[ ] 0 - 10,000

[ ] 10,001 - 50,000

[ ] 50,001 - 100,000

[ ] 100,001+

I got a speeding ticket for:

[ ] 10 over

[ ] 20 over

[ ] 30 over

[ ] I am posting from a jail cell

My favorite nickname for a Mustang is:

[ ] Rustang [ ] Mufftang

[ ] Mustank [ ] Other _________

I named my:

[ ] Car [ ] Right hand

[ ] Unit [ ] Tools

My car's color is:

[ ] White [ ] Black [ ] NYG [ ] Blue

[ ] Yellow [ ] Red [ ] Several of the above

[ ] All of the above [ ] Other _____________

[ ] an important determinant of how quickly my car can do the 1/4 mile

I would like to take your time to flame somebody who :

[ ] is bending the rules of physics in their tech data.

[ ] is new to the list [ ] works at Chrysler

[ ] serviced my car [ ] is more knowledgable than me

[ ] has a single spelling error.

[ ] other ____________.

(Insert standard flame here. Non-standard flames are not acceptable.)

[X] My computer will not send mail containing flames directly to the individual; only to the list

The next generation Neon will have (choose one from each column):

[ ] framed windows [ ] a 2.0 DOHC/SOHC

[ ] frameless windows [ ] a turbo mitsu. engine

[ ] No windows [ ] an engine from Shelby(!)

My favorite song to which to, uh, ahem, ummm, drive is:

[ ] Anything by Vanilla Ice

[ ] By an artist that is so cool I am sure you have not heard of him/her

[ ] I Touch Myself, by the DiVinyls

My stereo:

[ ] Can be heard by cars 1/3 mile in front of or behind me

[ ] Requires several extra alternators on my engine

[ ] Goes to eleven

I am including:

[ ] Forwarded text not marked with the ">" convention to designate included text

[ ] The entire post to which I am replying, including non-relevant content

[ ] The entire digest version of the day's mailings

[ ] The contents of my disk drive

[ ] The contents of our LAN file server

[ ] An archive of the entire Internet

It will be in the following format:

[ ] HTML for those who do not have mail readers capable of it

[ ] One copy each of the same message in Text and HTML

[ ] uuencoded

[ ] Audio, video, and other non-text formats

[ ] All of the above, with a few GIFs and JPEGs for good measure

Subscription:

[ ] How do I unsubscribe

[ ] Help! How do I unsubscribe

[ ] How go I get off this list

[ ] I didn't save the first message I received telling me how to unsubscribe, even though it said to save it

[ ] I didn't read the message at the bottom of each posting I receive that tells me where to send administrative requests

[ ] Extra copies of how to subscribe/unsubscribe to the list

My tires have been on my car:

[ ] under 10,000 miles

[ ] 10,000 - 20,000 miles

[ ] 20,001 - 30,000 miles

[ ] 30,001 - 40,000 miles

[ ] 40,001 - 50,000 miles

[ ] over 50,000 miles

[ ] I don't know

Microsoft:

[ ] Sucks

[ ] Does not

[ ] Does too

[ ] Does not

[ ] Does too

My exhaust tip is:

[ ] The size of a manhole cover

[ ] Bigger than yours

[ ] Is not

[ ] Is too

[ ] Is not

[ ] Mine has four tips!

Me too!!!!:

[ ] I have a green key too!!!!

[ ] I can hit 130 MPH too!!!!

[ ] I hate Mustangs/Camaros too!!!!!

[ ] My dealer ripped me off too!!!!!

[ ] I had a wreck too!!!

[ ] I don't want to add useful information or discussion to this list either!!!

Miscellaneous:

[ ] Nitto tires [ ] Nology wires [ ] Amsoil

[ ] Snake oil [ ] Me too!!!!

[ ] How much is a new engine

About This Checklist (must choose one):

[ ] This checklist doesn't apply to me (and I am including it in its entirety to prove it)

[ ] This checklist offends me (but doesn't apply to me)

[ ] I was touching myself while I surfed the 'net for nudie pictures and found this form by mistake

Signature:

[ ] HTML for those who do not have email readers capable of it

[ ] Much bigger than my actual post (not counting the entire digest which I included)

[ ] An audio file

[ ] Racist, sexist, or offensive to certain religions

[ ] The entire bill of materials required to build a Neon down to the smallest nuts and bolts

_____________________

Guidlines for posting:

o Please discontinue the posting of original content.

o Only submit via this form.

o Please include this checklist in its entirety. Do not delete non-relevant portions.

o List members must submit this form at least four times per day. Do not change responses from post to post.

o All responses will be tallied, analyzed, and collated, but no useful statistics will be given. Instead, all posts will be forwarded in their entirety to each member of the list.

Josh Murrah, jmurrah@salug.org, http://www.salug.org/~jmurrah , ICQ 4613433

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This mail is a natural product. The slight variations in spelling and grammar enhance its individual character and beauty and in no way are to be considered flaws or defects.