This site is dedicated to Boston's expatriates, scattered around the country and the globe. Here you will find links to sites dealing with all things Bostonian. Choose from the following topics:
Look for this mahk of excellence 
next
to the best sites!
BY FAR the most popular part of this website, this primer on the Boston accent has been given its own webpage! For audio samples of the English language as it was brought forth onto this continent, CLICK HERE.
The
Samuel Adams Brewery: Brewer,
patriot... what more could you ask for? This site is as good as a real-life
tour of the brewery, but without the free beer. On second thought....
The Museum of Science: Perhaps
your name isn't Karen, and you can't walk like a penguin...
that's okay! Stop by the Museum of Science where "it's fun to find
out".
Irish
Pubs in Boston: Sure,
crawling from pub to pub beats the crap out of websurfing for bars, but
if you are heading back for a short visit and want to see what's going
on at your favorite haunts, this is the place. My personal favorite, the
Black Rose,
has its own webpage. If you've never been there, it's an absolute must-go.
Tell 'em I sent ya..
Find-A-Grave:
Boston is a great place to live, but it's an even better place to
die. In cities like Los Angeles, the dead are carted away to the outskirts
of the civilization and buried in hidden, out-of-the-way places so as to
not "bum anyone out". In Boston, graveyards occupy prime real
estate on practically every city block, and the dead are even allowed to
vote! Click on the Find-A-Grave logo for a listing of famous gravesites
in Massachusetts.
The
Bruins got hosed in last year's
playoffs against the ex-Bruins (also known as the Washington Capitals).
This year's squad looks even better than last year's. Hopefully this season
will yeild either a Stanley Cup or a few "goons" to reclaim our
reputation as the biggest, baddest team in the league. Is Jay Miller still
playing somewhere?
In
1998, the Red Sox broke their streak
of consecutive playoff losses by clobbering Cleveland in Game 1 of the
Divisional Series. They immediately began a new streak (now at three),
and with Mo Vaughn suiting up for the Halos, the prospects of another playoff
win in the near future are dim indeed.
The
Celtics got off to their best
start in years this season, when the NBA Lockout extended into January.
Mark my words: UMass alum Rick Pitino will lead the Green into a playoff
birth and a first-round upset in the abbreviated season. If I turn
out right, I will flaunt this prediction; if not... well that's what
editing is for.
So this season was a bit of a disappointment, underscored by the fact that
the Jets and that filthy rotten Tuna advanced in the playoffs. Thank God
they choked in the thin air of Mile High. If the Pats
can get a running game, they will be in good shape for next season, in
what has become the toughest division in the NFL. As for moving to Insuranceville,
I refuse to acknowlege that fact until it actually happens. Perhaps
the only state government capable of greater fuck-ups than that of the
Commonwealth is the one that holds dominion over the Nutmeg State.
The Boston Globe maintains
a pretty good website, although the most practical applications of the
print version (wrapping fish, lining bird cages, and training puppies)
are lost upon it's cyber-companion.
Yes, indeed... life without Chet and Natalie can be UNBEARABLE at times - especially if you live in a media market with piss-poor news coverage (Los Angeles, for example). If you are lucky enough to have a satellite or DirectTV, you can still tune in to "Albert's Almanac" and the like... but the rest of us have to settle for the Channel 5 website.
Here are a few reminders of why the hell you got out of there
in the first place.
Crappy
Weather 
Boston gets more rain than Seattle, and is windier than Chicago.
When you factor in the fact that Boston eases gently from numbing cold
to oppressive heat and humidity, you've got one of the most inhospitable
climates in the US. Click on the title above for the 5-day Boston forecast,
courtesy of USA Today.
Senator Edward
M. Kennedy (D-Mass.)
If you are a former Bostonian living anywhere else in the US, you have no doubt been asked by denizens of your new surroundings to explain how it is that the people of Massachusetts keep sending this guy back to the Senate. Teddy wouldn't be elected Dog Catcher in any other town, even if the only other people running were Pat Harrington ('Schnieder' on "One Day at a Time") and Robespierre (executed by guillotine in 1794). Being held responsible for Ted's perpetual re-election is one of the biggest obstacles facing today's expatriate Bostonian.
And for all those out there who think Clinton should be impeached for his crimes, just remember this... at least he didn't KILL anybody.
(Note: You must be 21 to enter Ted's website, as alcohol will be served)
I have written a humorous but completely true account of "The Day I Met Ted Kennedy" in case you give a crap.
This is NOT my creation... it's an e-mail 'forward' that's been floating around awhile (and sent to me by about a dozen people). Chances are if you are a Bostonian, you don't find the comic stylings of Jeff Foxworthy to be particularly amusing. You may, however, find some humor in the Beantown version of the WAY overdone "You might be a redneck" bit'.
1) If you think of Philadelphia as the "deep south".
2) You think it's your god-given right to cut someone off in traffic.
3) You think there are only 25 letters in the alphabet.
4) You think three straight days of 90+ is a heat wave.
5) All your pets are named after Celtic hall of famers.
6) You refer to 6 inches of snow as a "dusting".
7) Just hearing the words "New York" puts you in an angry frenzy.
8) You don't think you have an attitude.
9) You know the significance of 1918.
10) Everything in town is "a five minute walk".
11) When out of town, you think the natives of the area you're visiting are all whacked.
12) If you still can't bear to watch highlights from game 6 of the 1986 World Series
13) You have no idea what the word compromise means.
14) You've never used your blinker while driving.
15) You don't realize that you talk twice as fast as everyone else.
16) You're neurotic, spasmatic & stubborn.
17) You think if someone is nice to you, they must want something or are from out of town.
18) You think $15 to park is a bargain.
19) Your favorite adjective is "wicked".
20) You think 63 degree ocean water is warm.
21) You don't own a hunting rifle, and you certainly don't know how to hunt.
Not Boston specific, but pissah nonetheless.
If you've moved away from Boston, chances are it is much easier to find your way around your new city than it was to navigate Beantown. That's because every other city in America designed it's streets for the purposes of allowing people to move about easily. Boston's streets were designed to confuse the British.
In the event you need help finding an address anywhere in the US, go to this site. All you do is type any complete street address in the search engine, and you will get a street map with your address marked by an 'X'. You can zoom in and out, yada yada yada... it's wicked awesome.
click HERE to
use the wicked pissah maps
