After much debating, I have narrowed down my support to three candidates: Rev. Al Sharpton, Gen (Ret.) Wesley Clark and Dennis Kucinich.  Overall these three candidates represent the changes I want to see in America.  Regardless if any of these candidates win the Democratic ticket, their mere presence will be powerful enough to make sure that whomever wins the ticket, will need to keep some of their issues in the forefront of the race to take back America!!!

I forgot how to smile.  After an extremely draining and long conversation last night, I realized, maybe it is true I have forgotten how to smile.  Never really noticed it until now that I don’t smile as much as I used to.  I guess the burdens of the past weigh too heavily on my shoulders in the present, making it ever so hard to always walk around looking happy.  I know at some point I need to let go of my past demons and move forward.  But, how do I do that?  Forgiving is one thing, but ultimate forgiveness comes with being able to forget.  Forgetting is the hard part – Remembering is what keeps my guard up and makes me weary of new and sometimes, old folks.  Remembering has kept me safe, my heart from truly being broken and most of all from being disappointed in those you know who can be and do better.  What I guess I don't know yet is - Has remebering kept me from truly living?  Maybe I will never know -- But right now, I realize I am no longer the youth who saw goodness in all and had faith in all – I have grown, I have experienced.  I know that with good comes evil – is this a morbid feeling, maybe, but it is the truth!!!  So if you don’t see me walking around with my big-toothed silly grin, it does not mean that I am not happy, but just thinking.

I was asked, “When is your birthday?” – My reply to folks who I haven’t known for some time is, “Oh, it’s not important.”  The person took some offense for me not sharing the information; they felt I was being suspicious of the reason behind the question.  Actually I didn’t care why they were asking and I really didn't feel the need to share.  The reason behind my not sharing had nothing to do with me being suspicious but not telling was a preventive measure.  To explain, for the last twenty years my birthday has always sucked…yes folks, twenty – Most of my happy birthdays were when I was toddler and I can only tell by the pictures, they may have sucked as well, but I can’t remember that far back.  So celebrating the day is not a big deal for me, just the fact that I am alive another year is.  Maybe going out and having a huge party would be the ideal thing I do for my birthday, but if I plan it always flops, so I don’t plan and I ask others not to make a big deal of it.  When others make a big deal of my birthday, something always happens to the person who planned the proposed outing and/or rememberable moment (i.e. onset of influenza, an ankle sprang).  Maybe these bad luck events were coincidences or maybe my birthday is cursed – I will never know, but not making a big deal about my birthday is okay with me and has been for some time.  However, in the end I ended up telling the person the day of my birth because maybe something bad should happen to them for making me miserable for not willingly giving up my birth date.