I begin this third part of my eletter to Stephen with a Flashback in which I skim what I was doing by taking the letter parts into an ending, fairly complex, poem. Psychedelos in part 1 and and Cosmic Language in part 2. I end this third part with Night Desert and it ends the whole three part eletter. A smaller, simpler (maybe) poem. Nothing I say in Waking has much meaning apart from my poems...

----- Page thumber:
Message offering the free book: a "kickoff" essay.
Message asking for responses, rewrite of the first essay....
Response to another message on "defining poetry" (relevant)...
Email to Stephen with his message ("Book") that I "answer" outside group messages.
Email to Stephen, part 2 of my "answer", weaving Waking into my poems.
Email to Stephen, part 3 of my "answer".
Phonemic instrument - a ship in a bottle? An "exploratory" essay...
Endpiece
Waking section on Archive page.
 
----- Original Message -----
From: Gene Fowler
To: Stephen Morse
Sent: Monday, December 27, 2004 7:40 PM
Subject: Re: ...from heaven! Echoes on waking...

Bookstore browser from ...heaven ! Echoes on waking...
 
Flashback:  I ended each of the first two parts of this with a poem. The poem likely seems to be attached, an inclusion or addendum, but that's not the case. It's written in.... In part 1, it's Psychedelos and I was talking about word play, but hardly the word play that comes with playing with words as words, as toys, as things that exist apart from their being freshly made in each use, and easily, therefore, twisted, morphed.... All through Waking I stress music and the use of "instruments", so it's not too big a jump to say I play words rather than that I play with words.... In the phonemic flow, they're something like, but not too like, chords....I'm not a musician or composer, so I can't borrow nuances I'd like to borrow and assume are there ...in any human activity. Anyway, from word play to playing words.... Knowing that c'n allow a listening reader to skate on the bright surface, enjoy it all, but to go, too, with his or her "reflection" down under the surface, into the poem. Is it a poem only for reading, or at least "reading along" with someone reciting or reading aloud...? No, given an oral reader who can enunciate as old Shakespearean actors were taught, the shifted words can be forced into the waiting ears. and for the tougher ones, spaces can be created....
 
At the bottom of part 1, is Stephen Morse's not to the Mother Poetry (motherofallpoetrygroups) group with a subject of only "book". In my "Re" I played that into a sinuous line.... The "book" message made sense. I'd offered paper copies of the book and laid out something of a path into the book, to be  continued in an old brochure "advertising" the book that I'd stuff into each book sent. A little later, I sent a note suggesting that questions, comments, or, better "taking off from" the book, "thinking out loud", be sent to Mother Poetry. Under that, I gave the original notice, rewritten a bit. More path blazes.
 
Part 2, ends with Cosmic Language. It's the third of three "walking" poems that are pillars supporting Fires: Selected Poems: 1963-1976 — 2002+ Annotated Edition. In the poem all three of the poems are linked to in my online copy of the book, though all three are in Juice Online 04. The three poems, taken in the context of understanding why I approach things as I do in Waking, show steps in a process.... The first walk, is an all night walk through San Francisco and the second is an all night walk in Berkeley because that's where I lived, precariously, in a poet's world. Cosmic Language is a walk indirectly into the poetic, or creative, imagination. And that's why the particular scenery that's there. For the rest, it's just a poem. I'm playing the language, the cosmic language.... I'm a small chamber group. A couple phonemic players, for polyphonic effects, a sensemic player, a revelemic player.,  Or, maybe a small orchestra, several of each.... Entering the poetic imagination ...sounds pretty mystical, doesn't it? Some other state of being? How do you do it? How do you know when you've done it? and is that only after, or can you wake in the imagination for some lucid imagining?
 
You see, that's why I did what I could about writing a Waking. Nobody else seemed to be doing it. I looked for the common, everyday entering that nobody notices. I knew a lot of authors talked about using dreams and I thought okay, but that seems like an Olympic triple jump, really. But then, there's daydreaming. Everybody does it. I expect most writers, or most people writing, will daydream content, but ...daydreaming the writing? While you're doing it? Well, It was a place to start. So, I started the Sixth Hour with it.... I think of musicians, who aren't by the numbers, daydream in their playing, as they play all the parts.... Cosmic Language (and the title tells you something, or I thought it might) is not an easy walk, though there's nothing to "figure out", nothing to be difficult, or hard, in a school sense. It's just a long hike over wild terrain, your own breathing becoming hurricane winds.... To get out of this flashback, before my letter to Stephen (and Mother Poetry, maybe), I guess I'll come out of that pure poetic imagination, just to the edge of it in my poem A Day at the Beach and the middle section which I call...
 
Playing Catch

i find pebbles
    in the wet sand
dark agates
veined in white
dull bloodstones
         blue green bits
of fossilized sea
smoothed glass
    taken from men
returned as pebbles
i grind my knee
         in the sand
a rough wearing
a sound of the sea
    an erosion
scrape knuckles
taking up pebbles
         the sea has left
i run heavily
    in the tight sand
kicking up foam
throwing the pebbles
         far out
to sea and waiting
for them to wash in 
 
 
Stephen,
 
I "discovered" San Francisco on January 1st, 1964. I was born just over 32 years earlier in Oakland and had lived the whole of my life - except for a few brief excursions - in the East Bay.

      The city was a silhouette. And I don't recall looking at it very often or really seeing it. It might as well have been New York, 3000 miles away. Or New Orleans, a ghost shimmering in half-remembered movie sets.

      The night of December 31st, 1963, I was in a Berkeley apartment drinking wine with a woman with whom I shared confusions about destiny and a fellow whose meandering life sometimes intersected my meandering life so that we were sometimes friends. My friend was just back from South America with a book of his poems newly published. My companion was a folk-singer, a composer of songs (even at least one "classic" English ballad, the Matty Groves tale from the Lord's viewpoint), and we both wrote poems.

      Battling with the sealed rim of a metal wine-bottle cap, I foggily decided I was a poet. Finally, the clarifying point in the shimmering vision of destiny.

      Berkeley, of course, is a cultural center." It has been for a long time. A major university and all that. But, my friend assured me, San Francisco is where poet's crack the womb and gasp in air and light. He wakened, with those remarks, the urge in me - and events led to one more in the millions of births of San Francisco.

      He had an apartment on the top floor of a great beast of a building on Eddy, just off Van Ness. (It's gone now.) An old Victorian two doors away had a vacancy sign out.

      The next day, while my companion packed, I went off with my friend and the last of the wine and rented a basement apartment with little light from the above ground tops of windows, an old metal bed that imitated a giant hammock and a stove with the oven door wired shut.

      Surely as any science fiction hero, I'd stepped through a space-time warp into a "new" world. When my companion saw the apartment, a great sadness passed over her face. She was sad because she'd have to live in this Dostoevskian basement; she was sad because I reminded her of the human condition - the great unwisdom.

      This was not the birthing of San Francisco for her. She had grown up in the Fillmore. Her father, a painter and sculptor, had set her, an infant, on the bar in Vesuvio's, while he had his afternoon beer. She baby-sat Rexroth's daughters after being baby-sat by Weldon Kees' girl friend (and one of Rexroth's wives, too). She'd sparkled at Lowell High School among the precocious. San Francisco was home. And this was a somewhat undesirable apartment.

      But I entered into a magical world - unmarred by a wired shut oven. Not quite Brigadoon. More subtle. Even raunchy. The city was about to be born. And poetry.

 
A POET'S SAN FRANCISCO
California Living, San Francisco Sunday Examiner & Chronicle
August 3, 1975
 
Discovered has a special meaning, here, that is why it's here. I'd never lived far enough from San Francisco that I couldn't see it from any near-by piece of high ground.  And I'd been in it. I didn't quite discover poetry that afternoon, either. I'd come out of San Quentin in very late 1959. I had rent tickets for an old hotel, beat up but clean, across from the Oakland police station on Fourteenth street  And meal tickets for a not-too-greasy spoon next door and a job at the Kaiser hospital on Macarthur and Broadway. The hospital, or the old wing of it, with an impossible Italian name, was the one in which I'd been born. I was part of a squad who delivered record jackets and picked them up. Another member of that squad was the friend I mentioned above, Luis Garcia. (My companion was Hilary Ayer, her father Richard Ayer.) So, Luis pulled me toward Berkeley — another place close by and a long way away.
 
What matters in my California Living piece (I've others also online), is the "discovery" because I was indeed (and I just typo'd that indeep, which seems an omen) opening out into what I guess you could call the poetic, or creative, imagination, that "deeply" rooted (in the sensory-motor mechanisms) imagination involving the whole or holy heart-beat of pumping sensing into knowing and knowing into sensing and involving all the human experience taken in from everywhere (and when) directly or indirectly (which is what "Waking the Poet" and Cosmic Language are about. Take this passage from City Hunt (also in Fires) referring back to my Shaman Songs (also in Fires) and the reactions of some in the poets' communities...
 
snarling, whining
that i'd move up to the high desert
get wind burnt, rip
off and wear the Indian's skin
                  or
drift back farther in coriolis
                      swirls
of time,
wear mammoth
hide, rip off
the raw boned Siberian's sighting,

                     but i turn
               more deeply

the thing in me'd
go deeper,

                  farther back,

to be again
a molecular sentience in primal
soup, the first hot sea, and rebound

            to fling itself outward

                        and know wholly

our galaxies

                        our constellar

                                    cities.
 
 
 
Except for some strange concepts like pumping knowing into sensing, I seem almost to shrink the horizon in Waking, to focus almost on the single phoneme as I talk of the phonemic flow and put that on the felt flow of air out of the throat and through the mouth, guided and punctuated by the goings on within the mouth.... And so my strange drawing of the phonemic instrument and my "discovery" of it in the glyphs or "letters", the "litters and scions". That line is like the keel of a ship, comes out of the throat and on out the mouth, and the two "collections" of descriptions or meanings above and below are like the curved up hull and its two lips, coming, really, to be one mouth with two makings. Odysseus' "ship". Coleridge played it in what Burke called his "concealed" alliterations.... And in that, we then see the child, or the true and complete illiterate, as early alphabets come inside his or her horizon, watching a speaker to learn to talk and daydreaming talking into a writing (or wrighting).... How could the m-sound not be lips, and why not then become the m-sound leading off in all those Latinate words for the sea with it's waves? If it's the sea within.... The poetic, or creative, imagination....
 
Nature of the work...
 
It made a difference in my path that I was opening to the whole of an innards and not some surface or shell within it where a discipline has formed and can be taken onboard.... And I learned a larger discipline, by chance. I looked to see what poets did. And the poets looming large, of course, from earlier, the ones people wrote about, were Pound and Eliot. These two did things in their poems, took on jobs of work. The young neo-Turks wrote about Pound, a vast industry — because you could go into the Cantos and write a couple books and a dozen or so essays, articles, poems, and maybe never come out. And the young neo-classists wrote about Eliot, and job after job, Prufrock, Waste Land, Ash Wednesday. Figure them out? You didn't have to. But could in almost infinite "parallel" tracks...
 
I thought that's what poets did! And I carried that into even my small poems. After all, Pound, certainly, and Eliot often, did. So, I wrote Vivisection (not a prison poem in the usual sense), Shaman Songs (not an Indian poem, though taking up much of what they left in the continent's soil, Natural History of Woman (about film-making — sort of) and on and on.... Which explains my "archive", a glass archive visible from anywhere on Earth.... I am gathering, and annotating, my "body of work". It's not been read as a body of work. I don't think any of those poems I just listed, or any others, have been read in terms of what's undertaken and how its tried. Over the years, maybe, googlers wandering in by unintentionally, might.
it doesn't matter too much. I'm doing it as, in a way, finishing up the writing, the daydreaming....
 
In Waking, I push at some of what I call the makings. I pick up pebbles on a beech and I hear sounds coming out of them and I find hyp-gnosis, hypo/hyper-gnosis in and around them.... The details of that are in the Third Hour. And in that hour, and in the fourth, I talk of the phonemes as "pieces of gesture", which relates back to the sensory-motor core where everything is born. It's physical. You likely knew on hearing where I got the makings as my translation for poetics (as maker is our translation of poet). The guys that roll their own smokes. We know now it's dangerous. But there's something to take from it. I liked the image. We have the tobacco. Something that grew wild and that we, then, cultivated. Then, there's the paper, an industrial product, though it was birthed in craft with papyrus and skins and.... Anything we could mash, dry and get a surface on. To seal it, our spit. Something we bring up from inside and spit out. But, the human part is the rolling dance of the fingers.
 
The closing...
 
I'm going to close off this tri-part ramble about Waking not with another prowling around my sea's edge, but with something simple, more "everyday" (or every night). The sensemes moving around, blending and then unblending, like Chinese Rings in a magus' hands....
 
NIGHT DESERT

Sun glare left over
out of the dream,
street lamp
framed in the window.
Roll over, put my hand on
a moist haunch
- sprouts an arm
to pat me
dismissingly.

Mist around the moon.
Rain tomorrow.
Mist around the street lamp.
Rain any minute.
Sun glare burns gristle out of sockets;
desert sand shifts,
                          flowing
in slow motion currents
through flesh.
Cup a warm breast.
Evoke a shove.
Keep changing. If you lie down
among the visions
you'll never get up.
They'll find bleached principles
along the roadside
or in a gully
miles from any road
or on gritty flatness where even winds
twist down into gasps.
The last white bone
catches the glint of light -
moon - lamp - sun.
The roadside drifts around
always pointing
another
way.
 
 
Gene
 
Gene Fowler
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